Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Age or Ability Specific Forums Pre-school 2 year old Driving me Bonkers!

The first thing I think you need to remember that no matter how smart he is, you're smarter AND wiser. And you have better impulse control than he does. You also have less frustration because you have control over almost everything in your life.

If he's advanced then you have an advantage over other parents in that he will understand you talking to him.

My 2 year old tried to be a runner. What I did was institute a strict rule that he must be holding my hand at all times if he was walking. If he wouldn't hold my hand, he would be carried or be put in the shopping cart or stroller. If I couldn't physically keep him in the shopping cart or my arms we would go straight to the car. Depending on how much he wanted to be out or at home I would either go home, or wait it out in the car.

I still have locks on our doors at home. I can't imagine allowing a two year old to have the option to walk out of the house. Same with letting him have access to his sibling's artworks and bags of flour. If you child-proof your house a lot of the issues will simply disappear.

I think all spanking him teaches him is that it's OK to hit people. It doesn't teach them internal self discipline and once they're bigger than you you'll be SOL for discipline. We prefer to use the far more manipulative and tailored method of natural consequences. For every problem you can't head off in advance, there is a logical consequence. Like, if you can't hold hands and stay near mom, you can't walk. If you smear your food all over the kitchen, then it's not edible and you'll be hungry by the next mealtime. If you don't wear a coat, you get cold.

If he's really into painting things he shouldn't, try and create opportunities for him to paint with interesting textures. Shaving cream or pudding in the bathtub is fun.

When he won't stay in bed you need to make coming out of bed really unrewarding. I have turned off all the lights in the house to make it boring for my kids. You probably will be able to just wordlessly and calmly take him back to bed and put him in, as many times as it takes. He'll fall asleep eventually, and with no interesting reward of mom losing it and shouting and hitting it won't be nearly as fun.

Then, I'd look at why he's not falling asleep. Is he not tired yet, or overtired? Is his pre-bed routine long enough or too long? Is his circadian rhythm off? Is he having TV in the evening that's waking him up? Is he too hungry by bedtime because dinner is early, or is dinner too late and he's overhungry and can't eat? Is he ready to drop a nap or should he still be napping? Is his nap too early or too late in the day?