DeHe, I'm not sure how much of a problem it is. I'd say right now it's more of a molehill than a mountain, mostly because he's young and still learning his way in life. He just simply doesn't know yet that this isn't always the socially acceptable way to respond, and as far as he knows, it's an effective way to respond. I can say that I'm impressed by his ability to synthesize ideas and emotion and language to come up with some effective retorts!
In the long run, though, it is something I think you could address. When you become aware of a situation like that where he has stood up for himself in this way, I would have a conversation with him about how you're glad he stood up for himself, and you know it was hard for him to put up with the negative situation, but there are some other ways that he can handle a situation like that in the future. He can wait less long to stand up for himself, and perhaps that will allow him to respond before he has reached a high level of frustration or anger. He can simply state how he feels about someone doing or saying something mean to him. He can learn to tell an adult if he has already tried to tell the tormentor to stop and it hasn't worked. And, he can try to remove himself from the situation if he can. It would probably help to role play.
But again, he's 5. He's a smart little guy, but inexperienced in life. Luckily, he has you to guide him and teach him. So I wouldn't jump right to "mountain" just yet!
Last edited by mnmom23; 02/14/11 01:56 PM. Reason: spelling
