Mama22g we see this with our DD9. She doesn't want to do any work without "checking" first to make sure what she is supposed to do. Her favorite words at homework time are "but, I don't know know what I am supposed to do!!!" (scream cry tantrum thrown in here :-(
Last year she was in an inclusion class with the full spectrum..kids with a mental disabilities to gifted kids..{I know our school dist is wierd}..anyway. Her teachers would give an assignment and then joked to us that they would bet with each other how long it would take our daughter to raise her hand or approach then questioning the directions...saying she wasn't sure what to do....They were giving easy instructions so that the mentally challenged kids could understand yet here she was gifted and just sat there.
We came to 2 conclusions that I believe are all mixed up with each other. 1 perfectionism and 2 anxiety. She is so anxious about doing it perfect she is afraid of starting cause she might get it wrong. We also noticed something else..the easier the assignment the more she questioned and melted down. She couldn't believe the answer or the work could be that simple so to her she must just not be understanding what it was they were looking for ie melt down.
We are lucky. This year she is not in an inclusion class, and she has a wonderful teacher that just responds to her anxiousness in a very positive way. This has led to less anxiousness on her part and an easier year.
Good luck!
