I'm new to the Twice Exceptional family (DS has autism), but one of the first things I read was that gifted and LD do NOT cancel each other out. So your school refusing to see the deficit as a problem and refusing to accommodate for it is wrong. What does your IEP have in it if it is not addressing these problems? I would request an IEP meeting and (another?) functional behavior assessment to get a better behavior plan in place. He's having behavior problems that interfere with school work...that is exactly what the school is supposed to be dealing with. If you can, bring in the experts who diagnosed and are treating him outside the school. Schools LOVE to listen to them instead of "just a mom."
My son is only 7, and we have been tweaking his IEP and behavior plan since he first got them at age 3. I know it will be a never ending problem. I feel "at wit's end" at times, also...but you have got to keep trying over and over!! I ask myself, "Does he belong in an institution? No, of course not! Should he be in the autism unit? No, of course not!" So I keep working with the school to find a solution over and over and over again. Right now, we have things set up with a new school, but he has 2 weeks left in his current school and he is causing trouble. It is a constant roller coaster and I understand your desperation. Nan
