I have a DS10 who I knew had an LD that was not yet diagnosed. He spelled his first word at 3, and was always asking if this word was spelled this way, but was not able to recognize any word in print until 5.
You better believe I worked with him to cross that bridge. I didn't want him to go to K and waste a year losing self esteem and failing to learn to read. I wanted to know for myself that it was possible for him to learn and I wanted to know exactly how to teach him. He actually went in as one of the better readers in the class and didn't get diagnosed until 3rd grade.
He's a phonetic learner and could read a lot of things phonetically by the time he went to K, maybe a first grade level reader?
I can say with certainty that he couldn't learn to read until he was ready. I watched him become ready, and taught him at the level he was ready for. With an LD, that doesn't necessarily happen as automatically as with another child where everything can come together for a result. LDs require that you accommodate so the LD won't hold them back. It's OK if it turns out your dd has no LD! That's good news, not a reason to feel like a hot houser.
It's not about pleasing the school. It's not about watching everyone else and doing what they do. This isn't a test that you can "cheat" on. It's about making sure that your child has a positive experience with learning. If I had not taught DS what I did, I am sure the experience would have been different.
I do regret one thing though. The school wanted the kids to know 20 out of 25 sight words by K (in addition to a bunch of other stuff he already knew). I drilled him until he knew them, which was not easy given that he had trouble recognizing words in print! I felt horrible doing it, knowing that it was not in keeping with his learning style, and knowing he wasn't ready, and I still feel guilty to this day that I could be so swayed by an authority like the school into giving up my good sense. It was a lesson that I have put to good use and have never repeated!
I hope that helps!
P.S. When we had him tested for K readiness by the school, they were pleased that he was doing well, had a good attitude, had been read to, etc. There was no scolding about having taught him anything, just praise for caring about his education.
Yes, this is totally my thinking. I didn't want her entering school and struggling from day one. It is not that I want her ahead of everyone else, I just don't want her to struggle and hate school, like I did. And I agree that she learned to read when she was ready. I am just following her lead. Now that she is taking off, we continue to work together at her level.
