Honestly I would simply tell her that it is not fair for her to be held to a different standard than the other children
I'm going to disagree here. Aren't we hoping that teachers will give our children work that is appropriate to the student (that is...harder?) Aren't we hoping that the teachers will see that our children can do more and should do more?
Which is why I followed that with "If she is expected to do different work then that work should be held to the same standards as the other children's work, but if they are not expected to redo messy work or redo wrong answers then she should not be expected to redo messy work or redo correct(!!!) answers."
I agree in differentiation, but I also believe in fairness. It is one thing to do work at a different level, quite another to be held to a different standard on that work. If no one else has to redo messy work, a gifty shouldn't either. If no one else has to redo their correct answers, a gifty shouldn't either. It is one thing to get appropriate work. It is a totally different issue if the child is being held to an unreasonable standard compared to the other children. When this happens the child becomes separated from the group in a very non-positive manner. The child's gifts become curses and they are trained to be perfectionists. There is a HUGE difference between appropriate differentiation and inappropriate standards based on a teacher's misunderstanding of or dislike for the child.
P.S. I didn't even comment about the bathroom thing because it was just so over the top imo. I see the point, but NO child should have to go through that.
