Firstly I hope that this in the right section. This forum has great information!

I posted a week ago about my DS who is 4, and received some great replies. So I bought and read the Dr. Ruff book (I can�t get myself past the �exceptional� bit in Gross� title yet�) as recommended. I think that he is in Level 4 going by milestones. But I have issues with some of it; he doesn�t read for pleasure i.e he won�t pick up a book and read it. He will read with me and to me but hasn�t got that insatiable bit yet. He�s not that interested in science, he doesn�t ask continuous questions about things like going from �why do we put petrol in a car?� to combustion for example. But he does ask questions about things that I don�t think are typical of a 4yr old; �why do we have eye lashes?� �what is fog?� and �why do the leaves fall off of the trees?� � and my answer �because it�s Autumn� wasn�t the correct one.

So I see no intense drive to learn, learn, learn (other than in maths) like is described. I did once � before he ever set foot inside a school. He is a very laid back child, polite, and a rule follower. But huge on fairness and he is quite pedantic about things.

He doesn�t have a passion right now (other than Maths which has been constant since forever), between 1-2 � he adored Thomas the tank engine from 2 � to 3 � he adored Pixar�s Cars. Now he quite likes Star Wars but it�s not all consuming like the other ones have been. I wonder if this highlights that the school situation isn�t so great.

Also in the book I got to the school options bit and read the bits for level 3 and 4. We only have the public (state) schools or private schools in my area. Primarily we can�t afford a private school; although I�m aware they have bursaries etc, but also I can�t drive so I have no way of getting him there. State school was the option she put as �must find an alternative�.

So do you have to be extremely motivated to be that (99th) gifted? He is like a normal 4 yr old who excels in math and reading. I know that testing is the best way to get a definite picture but having emailed around I�m looking at �600 minimum and that�s going to take us a while to get together what with Christmas. Even if we got him tested it will only satisfy us, I�m pretty sure the school is not going to change what they do. We have parent-teacher meeting next Tues and DP is suggesting if it seems to be appropriate he stays if not he wants to pull him out and home school. I see homeschool as a very viable option but I feel like I should be giving the school a chance. I�m too polite and would rather let someone walk over me than feel like I�m insulting them. I also think WAY too much about things and the thought that I am harming him in some way is stopping me from sleeping. All the various options are whizzing round my head and I have no idea where I am to start. If he is that gifted then is HS better? If he is how can I still be doubting it? Has school damaged him already? �.help?