Tangentially related:
After the recent hell-month-or-two, I called coordinator of DS' program and explained that he was really melting down, wanting to quit school, and that I was weighing options for next year. I told her I wasn't going to allow him to "just quit" but was trying to support him and help him understand that it wasn't in his best interest to just stop doing everything, because of one overwhelming class.
Her response: "Yes, and he needs to understand that he made a COMMITMENT."
I had a huge WTH/aha moment to that response. I understand that mentality, in terms of playing a sport, or performing in a play, etc., but this confirmed my hunch the school thinks they are providing a "privilege" to the students. No concern for the fact he was having daily anxiety attacks, saying that school made him hate himself, his saying one teacher hated him and would never give him a decent grade, etc. Just what he *owes* to the school.
He did have several very kind teachers, including one who said "What do we need to do to get DS through the end of school?" I suppose I am naive, because that was the sort of response I'd expect across the board.
I think it is very difficult for some personality types to understand that it's not necessary to be defensive at every turn. I'm not sure where that originates, although I suspect that the same super-organized, systems-oriented skill set that helps teachers function in that system, may be frequently accompanied by some rigidity.
