DS7 has so far been in the habit of trying to answer every time, and then gets corrected for blurting out answers if he isn't called on. But he is the type to go "internal" and angry if this happens in a way that humiliates him. Fortunately, this year, he has a teacher who is adept at correcting without humiliating. He doesn't have your daughter's empathy - you must be very proud of that!
One thing I've started trying to do for DS is talk to him about waiting through the "little answers", the one word answers, etc. That way, when the teacher gets to a big answer he can use his turn to talk to her about this more interesting point. And this is usually a "synthesis" point when there aren't many hands up anyway.
So, e.g., if they are talking about air - he could skip answering (a) what is in the air that we need to breathe in? Oxygen. (b) what gas comes out of our lungs when we exhale? Carbon dioxide. (c) what gas do plants need to take out of the air? Carbon dioxide. (d) what gas comes out of plants when they "exhale"? Oxygen. (e) so, if you were going to be locked in a chamber with food and water but only a certain amount of oxygen, how could survive? Bring plants in with you - because you exhale what the plants need and they exhale what you need. So a, b, c, and d are little questions. And DS7 should wait for the big question - (e). And then - let's make a terrarium!
Anyway - this is pretty sophisticated, and I doubt DS will get it any time soon. But I think it's worth introducing the idea. And your DD seems a little more savvy on classroom flow. So she could probably already tackle this! Just wait for the point when the questions get harder and the other kids drop out of the hand-raising queue.
Sue
