Oh Irena, I am so sorry!!! We had much the same experience at the first elementary school my kids went to - not just for our 2e ds, but for my dd who has medical issues. The thing that bothered me most were adults at the school (staff and parents) who didn't believe that my ds' challenges were real or that my dd's medical issues are real and who said that out loud to them. The worst of all was our school nurse.
I doubt the staff is doing this to be purposely hurtful to your ds or that your ds is the only student who's being treated this way, but it certainly doesn't sound like a school where there's been an effort to instill a positive environment among the staff - "positive" isn't the word I"m looking for but I can't think of what the word is at the moment! I was surprised at how different it was when we changed schools - not just the willingness to be accommodating of special needs, but finding an overall atmosphere of respect and good will among school staff, and an awareness that it's important to be mindful of what is said in front of young children.
Do you have any other schooling options in your area? I've found where we are that even moving to a different "neighborhood" school can make a world of difference in school atmosphere and staff attitude.
Another thought is - have you talked to your district's SPED supervisor about the attitudes that you've encountered and the things that have been said to your ds? At the very least it's possible that a call and conversation there might lead to some training or feedback for your school's staff from within the district, which would hopefully eventually filter down to how they treat the children that are in their charge.
Sending you a big hug!
polarbear
