It is true, however, that at 13-14yo, one has a lot of maturing still to do. That's true regardless of LOG. So even if you found "the one" person in the world who was actually compatible with you at that age, there is no guarantee that the two of you would be compatible at age 25, when you're both nominally "done growing up."
Viewing things through that lens, I think, is problematic. Our kids (as PG people) may well BE emotionally not their chronological ages, but that doesn't mean that we can assign them an OLDER but still-chronological age which does match.
The older they get, the harder it gets to say (with any accuracy) that they are "effectively +10 years" and otherwise comparable to NT people. They aren't. And less so with every passing year.
How on earth can I say that my 13yo DD is "like a 22 yo" in her social awareness, needs, and experience? She isn't-- because as we mature into adulthood, those social-emotional needs FUSE, and that is definitely not the case for her yet the way it is for that 22yo. Her sense of social justice may well be on par, all right. But her life experience is that of a 13yo. Kind of. Well-- a PG 13yo. It's just qualitatively different from NT people.
