I wanted to pull these quotes out to show you that he IS being affected by his bottlenecks. If you think he is lazy, unmotivated, skating by, then most teachers are probably thinking the same thing. If you are yelling at him every simgle morning, isn't it likely that he is internalizing a self image of himself as 'babyish' or 'unable to do things right?'
You are echoing my thoughts here. When I wrote about yelling at him in the morning to hurry up I had also written that now I feel terrible for having done that. I deleted that line thinking I need to focus on him and not my feelings here. Thank you so much for bringing it up. Yes Now I realize I havent been helping him at all. All this is new to me so I have a lot of learning to do. I grew up in an environment that was totally oblivious to such issues. Either you did well at school or you didnt and were labelled stupid or asked to work harder to catch up. I heard about things like dyslexia for the first time when I came here to the USA. I am trying to change my ways and educate myself on this. Last weekend DS did a double take and looked at me strangely when I sympathised with him about something. He seems to realize I am on his team now. keeping my fingers crossed :-)
To put it another way. Suppose that you had to go through each day with a 20 pound weight strapped to your head. Wouldn't you try to 'skate away with the least possible effort?'
Another great anology for me to remember.
This can be very hard to hear, and I do want you to set standards for your son.
Sadly, you can't work on everything at the same time.
Yes I am rather overwhelmed with all the information that is out there and more so with looking at Ds's actions in a new light.
Baby steps for now. Thankfully school will be done in a few weeks so we will have time to ourselves and one struggle less.
