It is tough because I know I probably send her mixed messages, "just try your best" and "just get it done"...for her trying her best really means going way overboard.
YES to this. It can become increasingly apparent that this is so when a child has an inappropriate placement in undifferentiated curriculum year after year.
BTDT, currently living it. It's difficult to convince educators that "100%" should
not be a goal for some learners-- particularly not those for whom it is a somewhat
realistic target. Students like that need to be in curriculum that either moves away from a criterion-based or norm-referenced assessment scheme entirely, or needs to be placed into a situation in which 100% is pretty much ONLY achievable through good luck in combination with top performance, and therefore seldom realistic and merely a pleasant surprise when it DOES happen. Alternatively, assessment can be based on crystal clear curricular goals and stellar writing of assessments, so that the level of effort necessary to earn "perfection" is clear and consistent. (Yeah, I know-- I had trouble not laughing, there, too. Never going to happen.)
Otherwise it leads to completely out of control perfectionism, especially in students who have a penchant for high achievement and recognition, or in those students whom adults have placed obviously high expectations on.
It's very hard not to praise kids for perfect scores, even when we know that the effort required is not always proportional.
