What kind of list of issues? my concerns about not ideal situations in the classroom (25 kids, no desks - a little much for a kid with attention and sensory issues), or behaviorial issues I see in my DS that need to improve to function optimally?
The best book for this is From Emotion to Advocacy-- they have sample letters for requesting evaluations.
I'd write a letter to the principal, copied to the district's intervention services/special ed office, detailing the meltdown problem and any other behavioral issues (social, attention) that you see. And ask them for a complete educational evaluation, using the template in From Emotion to Advocacy.
I'd also ask them to take data on the meltdowns in order to develop a plan to prevent them.
An educational eval depends on what issues you are seeing. If his pencil grip were weird, the OT would see him; if gross motor, the PT. For anxiety/behavioral issues there should be teacher and parent survey checklists plus a detailed classroom evaluation. They are likely to do IQ and achievement testing to look for LDs, if there's any indication that might be there.
I'd put the social skills on the list because if it's a real problem, you want to get the school to work on it in an eventual IEP, and you can't get it in the IEP if they didn't test for it. So at this stage you make the list cover everything that you have thought could be a problem.
You're not likely to get much traction on the problem of 25 kids in a class, but you might get him preferential seating and other accommodations.
We are meeting next Tuesday to make a plan on what to do next time he has a meltdown. It might be a good time to request something like a full educatonal evaluation when we have everyone in one room.
If you don't make the request in writing, it can be like it never happened. A verbal request has no legal standing. The written letter starts a clock on them to get the job done: I think they have 60 school days, which is plenty long enough if your kid is having meltdowns.
Good luck with the testing. I know not everyone agrees, but I don't think the official label always matters very much. What matters is finding what works for your kid. Perhaps he does fall on the Asperger's spectrum, but if all he needs is anxiety meds and some counseling to get him to a happy place, that's the primary goal.
I disagree with this. If you don't know what you're dealing with, you probably won't choose the right meds or the right counseling/therapy help. And that sort of thing matters. Talk therapy is totally ineffective for AS, for instance, but could work for other problems.
Labels are useful for funding, for getting services, sometimes directing treatment and for a little understanding from school officials etc. But labels are limiting. They put people in a box and limit what others think they are capable of and that can affect what our children think they are capable of too. That is the dilemma isn't it?
My experience says this: it is no fun to have a kid who sticks out because of unwanted behaviors (meltdowns being example 1 on my personal list). On the other hand, it is much nicer to have a kid whom teachers and peers understand and can accept-- he's melting down because of his Asperger's-- as opposed to the non-diagnostic labels of "weirdo" or "from an undisciplined family" or worse, which are applied to these children if you don't offer your community another explanation.
If your DS hasn't already, he will likely soon notice that other children do not have meltdowns, and he does. It is better to have an explanation for him (e.g. "you have anxiety, which means...") than let him think that he's the only one with no self-control, he can't behave, he's a bad person, which is the main alternative message available. The label can offer understanding and empowerment, in addition to services.
I wouldn't worry for a second about labeling my child under these circumstances, which we have experienced firsthand.
DeeDee
