2gift: Your posts make me feel so sad and bring back all the stress we went through last year with dd in kindergarten in a regional magnet. She began asking almost immediately for me to please find her a different school "I'll go to kindergarten anywhere else but Mommy, please, don't make me go back into that room." We tried working with the school and she just shut down. By the end of the year we had a clinically anxious 6 year old. How sad is that?
The school kept talking to me about her developing an ability to "self advocate" as she got older. I had to explain to them that she was already self advocating and THEY had to learn to listen to her. They weren't used to kindergarteners with such strong verbal skills so they just dismissed her. I had to focus very, very hard on listening to her words. It sounds like your dd may be doing some of this too - asking for changes, shutting down, etc. How can kids in this situation win when their self-advocating gets defined by the adults in charge as "manipulation"?
If your dd loves art then she needs to do art. Can you enroll her in some extracurricular art classes? If the school is recommending counseling maybe you can find an art therapist to work with her.
If your daughter is developing anxiety, depression or otherwise shutting down and losing her love of learning the situation will likely only get worse. "Next year" may indeed be better, or maybe not. Based on my dd's experience getting these kids out of these situations is the best thing to do if you have other options, as you indicate that you do.
With my dd it turned out that she had significant ld issues that no one at the school picked up on. Is it possible she is "refusing" to do worksheets, etc because of some ld being masked by the giftedness?
I know homeschoolers who do all the options you, aculady and Donna have described here. I also know people who "homeschool" in addition to regular school - they add every type of enrichment that can be to the child's week so they get the school experience and still explore their interests. Maybe something like that can work for you while you wait to see if next year will improve things.If you pull her out and go with the homeschool option I love aculady's idea about non-schooling for a while. Mine too was "SUCH a different kid in the summer" - we used that to her advantage and were able to get the anxiety under control through a detailed IEP at her new school.
Good luck and give your dd a hug from me. Please keep us posted.
