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���� For all you word lovers out there---this is classic!
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Puns for Educated Minds
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1.
The fattest knight at�King Arthur's Round Table�was Sir Cumference.
He acquired his size from too much pi.
2.
I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island,
but it turned out to be an optical Aleutian .
3.
She was only a whiskey maker, but he loved her still.
4.
A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class,
because it was a weapon of math disruption.
5.
No matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still be stationery.
6.
A dog gave birth to puppies near the road . . . and was cited for littering.
7.
A grenade thrown into a kitchen in� France�would result in Linoleum Blownapart.
8.
Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie.
9.
A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall.� The police are looking into it.
10.
Time flies like an arrow.� Fruit flies like a banana.
11.
Atheism�is a non-prophet organization.
12.
Two hats were hanging on a hat rack in the hallway
One hat said to the other:�'You stay here; I'll go on a head.'
13.
I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger.� Then it hit me.
14.
A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab center said:� 'Keep off the Grass.'
15.
The midget fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large.
16.
The soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.
17.
A backward poet writes inverse.
18.
In a democracy it's your vote that counts;
In feudalism it's your count that votes.
19.
When cannibals ate a missionary, they got a taste of religion.
20.
If you jumped off the bridge in� Paris�, you'd be in Seine .
21.
A vulture boards an airplane, carrying two dead raccoons.
The stewardess looks at him and says,�'I'm sorry, sir, only one carrion allowed per passenger.'
22.
Two fish swim into a concrete wall.� One turns to the other and says�'Dam!'
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23.
Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, so they lit a fire in the craft.
Unsurprisingly it sank,
proving once again that you can't have your kayak and heat it too.
24.
Two hydrogen atoms meet.� One says,�'I've lost my electron.'
The other says�'Are you sure?'
The first replies,�'Yes, I'm positive.'
25.
Did you hear about the Buddhist who refused Novocain during a root canal?
His goal:� transcend dental medication.
26.
There was the person who sent ten puns to friends,
with the hope that at least one of the puns would make them laugh.
�������������������������������������������������������� No pun in ten DID��
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