At my own house. Behavior is in direct correlation with mind activity. Not all days are perfect days for my DD6, but I do my best with a baby in the house to entertain as well. At three, we did take her to a psychologist for some extreme anxiety issues she was experiencing at the time and I really felt that it helped. She went to the psych for about three months and was returning to normal play again after that.
I would say to watch for escalating behaviors for sure. That's a definite red flag to me in our house.
In a pinch, I have her "create" environments out of shoe boxes and whatever materials indoors and outdoors she'd like. Northwest...desert...ocean...etc. That helps when I've not got anything else planned.
I also use a book called "Helping Your Anxious Child" which I adapted for my own use with a younger child. It helped. Negative reinforcement is not real effective at our house either. Although, I do still use some form of 1,2,3 or love and logic depending on the situation. Sometimes I just need time-out for my own sake.
But, like I said...I can tell when a change is needed because her behavior goes from bad to worse pretty quickly. And most often what's needed it MORE brain activity!!!
Good Luck, I'm also going to take a peek at Transforming the Difficult Child.
