joys-yes, my son loves both science and art. I find science to be a difficult subject to homeschool b/c it's not my favorite! I am working on trying to find something that is interesting and fun. Mostly it bores both of us to death which tells me I'm not doing the right thing. He LOVES science, so it's not the subject matter; it's the presentation I'm sure! Any suggestions? He wants to try some of the Lego educational products, but he's also interested in chemistry.
Movingup6-How old is child #2 now? About a year and a half ago, we saw this same escalation of tantrums and major frustration. We implemented the 5 minute rule. We'd say, "5 minutes." Then for 5 minutes we would completely ignore him. At first he'd hang on our legs, scream, cry and we'd pretend he was nothing more than a fly. It was pretty funny walking around with a child on your leg and pretending he wasn't there! Pretty soon, he'd go to his room, and scream and cry. After five minutes, only if he'd calmed down, we'd go in and have a conversation. Not long after that, as soon as we'd say "5 min" he'd go straight to his room and stop screaming/crying before he even shut the dooor. Then, the tantrums stopped altogether. Now, here we are again. Dh thinks we should just begin the same "5 min" rule again.
eamsnova-Ds wants someone with him all the time, for sure! I always thought it was because he had a personal nanny who was like a grandmother from the time he was 9 mos old until he was 4. She even lived with us for a while. Not to mention, I read all the lovely attachment parenting books before I gave birth and tried to follow them to a tee. He slept with me until he was 3. He breastfed on demand (no schedule). The list goes on. Suffice it to say, I personally wouldn't recommend that method to anyone!
Also, my parents are very involved, and they and the nanny have always given him undivided attention. I just thought he never learned to be alone, and maybe that's true. But, we've been working on that for a long time, and he still struggles with it. Maybe he is feeling anxiety; is it enough to just continue to work on doing things for himself? If I get a phone call, he finds something to have a meltdown over. If I'm in the shower, same thing. Even in the car, he freaks out if I just want to listen to music and not play a game with him. He is even reluctant to make a decision for himself (perfectionism), yet he has an opinion on anything and will argue that the sky is really green until he's blue in the face. I'm exhausted trying to keep him occupied.
We do use a calendar, but to be perfectly honest, I'm not the best at following any kind of routine or schedule. I'm organized but not schedule oriented. I try to do it for him, but it's a struggle. Since we're homeschooling, we seem to have a lot of free time. That's our downfall. He can't have downtime; he doesn't know what to do with himself. Shouldn't he be able to entertain himself for a little while playing in his room or even right next to me now that he's 6?
As for the counseling, I could definitely see ds wrapping the therapist around his little finger. He's very good at saying what he thinks people want to hear. He can rationalize anything and verbalize understanding about his feelings and whether his behaviors are appropriate or inappropriate. The problem is, when he gets frustrated, all reason goes out the window and he is just a little ball of feelings. Whatever he is feeling at that moment consumes him.
I guess I just went on and on as usual! I feel like I am complaining about ds on her all the time! He's a wonderful person with a great heart; I just want so badly for him to be a well balanced happy kid.
Thanks again!
Jen
I do notice that exercise makes a huge difference too.
