I haven't posted in a while because I believed all was going well.~ You can read up on me from old posts. My DS is 4.5 now; and we cannot find a good fit for him school-wise. His last situation (from which he has been removed for 3.5 weeks now) has left DS traumatized. Daily meltdowns and hitting and calling me "bad Mommy" are all included in our day from our once sweet, generally compliant (non-hitting...) little boy. He even says that it doesn't make him feel better. We feel that he really can't help it. Previously, he had about 6-7 fits ever, and almost none caused by household situations - mostly bad school fits or mean kids. Today is the first day without a meltdown since we removed him from his school. We are just not sure how to get my DS back. We use Positive Discipline (by Jane Nelson) with him. We threaten him with tickles and hugs and squeezes; which is working better than anything else right now. He is extremely angry with me (not my husband, btw); and very quick-to-frustration. On the flip-side, when he is not in meltdown mode, is his extreme clinginess or quiet solitude. We are all about the snuggles here; but it is just so sad to see him like this. My husband and I are at odds as to what to do. Corporal punishment is out of the question with him. He is a train-wreck. He has been bottling-up his frustrations inside, as he is still not as verbal as most. He will express his emotions ("I am frustrated," "scared," "tired," "angry..."), but details of the what's and why's are few and far between. Any advice is greatly, hopefully appreciated.
He has zero outside activities right now, as he is extremely resentful of authority figures currently. We tried an outside homeschool morning (with Classical Conversations), which was a nightmare for him (looked great to me) - and we stuck it out the entire time. We tried to start swimming again last week, which resulted in much crying and more frustration. Thankfully the director there also had a gifted child; but never saw a child as traumatized as him. She talked to him respectfully though; and we are going to try again this week with a private lesson.
I am trying to homeschool him. He is one to learn quickly - once and done... So, my traditional schooling is failing. His once very good focus is so distracted these days. It is like he is recalling some bad experiences. He does much better when he is playing on his Leapster or on the computer, instead of looking at papers and filling in blanks. He is extremely active as well. It was great last week when he initiated a game of "take away." He literally ran away with cards and hid them in my kitchen cabinets as I asked him how many I had left...I praised God for that one!!!
Sorry so long. I really just want to know if anyone "lost" their kid like this, and if they can offer any help. He is currently sleeping with us at night due to his having nightmares. If we don't get him awake right away and calm him instantly, it gets really bad. Right now he is yelling "no Mommy," or "Stop"??? I know that he is angry with me for having him there; but I also caught his last teacher say "come to Mama" once.
I am becoming sleepless (in north Atlanta), and am becoming an emotional train wreck myself. I am proud of myself for my calmness in this all though. Please, please help us to help him.
