Hello - a bit about me: My name is Victoria, and I have one son who will turn 5 at the end of November. He is an only child, and I feel that he exhibits signs of giftedness, though he has never been tested. We live in GA, and in this state, a child must be 5 by September 1st to enter kindergarten. I was informed that there are no exceptions to this rule. I placed my son in one of the free "GA Pre-K" programs. I do not feel that this was a good match, either academically or socially. (Realistically, I did not excpect much academically from pre-k; I hoped he would make friends and have fun.) Shortly after entering the pre-k, my son began to vehemently express his dislike of the school, saying things such as: "I want to move to Pluto; "I want to smash (the name of the school)", and (most disturbingly), "I wish I were dead/never born."
When we would ask what it was that he didn't like, he would invariably say, "the bad lunches (they had a rule that we must purchase their lunch - a rule I never even thought to ask about as it never occurred to me that a kid couldn't bring his lunch)," and "nap time (he hasn't napped since before 1 yr old, though the teachers were nice enough to let him read during nap time)." One day I asked the teachers if they could think of any reason why my son would hate going to school, and they seemed stunned. They said that he's not a behavior problem, very smart, and he seemed happy. I asked if he plays with other children, and they thought about it and said that he plays alone alot. I know that when he's with us at home, he's always trying to engage us in play. When I took him for orientation, I'd mentioned that he's reading. I was told, "that's ok, we had a number of readers last year." When I later asked if there are other kids at his level, they looked at each other and said, "no, some of the kids know some of their letters, but none of the others are actually reading." My son regularly reads Henry & Mudge, The Magic School Bus, etc. unassisted (and has for over a year). The last straw came for us last night when I discovered a BITE MARK on his arm. While my son neither complained at the school, nor to us, he was bitten so hard that the bruise was visible tonight, more than 24 hours after the occurence. My husband & I decided to withdraw him and place him in a small Montessori school. While the director of the old pre-k couldn't care less, the teachers of his old school were very upset. They felt that he was making great social progress (I admit that today, of all days, I did witness this for the very first time in his two months there), and said that I would be teaching him that any time he shows any difficulty I would yank him away. This particular teacher has a child with Aspberger's Syndrome, and states that my child shows some similar behaviors. I don't feel that I am in denial, but I genuinely don't think he has this condition. While he does lack some social snd motor skills, he is the only child of two reclusive parents. He posesses great empathy and while he has the large vocabulary, he has a great sense of humor and absolutely loves word play. Further, she said that Montessori would be great for him academically, but disasterous for him socially as it is all independent work/play. The Montessori school we are interested in is small and new; the director seems very interested in working with us, and said that social and motor skills would be a focus.
Sorry for such a long and rambling post; I am truly worried at this point. I'm also considering having him tested, though to what end, I don't know. The Montessori director is working with us financially, and we have had to make rather large cuts in our retirement savings, etc. to make this move. We are in a supposedly good area for public schools, so hopefully, next year will be ok (finger's crossed). Does anyone have any advice or similar experience?
