I wasn't allowed to skip 5th grade when I was identified as a candidate for acceleration because that would have put me in the same grade as my older sibling. They were only going to let me skip if she skipped too, but she didn't want to because she actually had friends.
We faced this. The school decided it was not a big deal if we made sure the kids were in separate classes so DD was moved up mid-year. However, my older one occasionally gets asked if her younger sister is “smarter” than her. That bothers her. Younger one though is benefiting - she has ADHD, and when she forgets her math homework she can get the sheet from her sister. All in all it has not been that big of deal. They have separate social lives.
And this:
(ALL) we can do is to learn from our mistakes and make the best choices we can going forward. We will inevitably make more mistakes but we're all just fumbling along.Absolutely. Sometimes the “what ifs” really plague me, but we have always tried to make the decision with all the best information we had. I will say I wish I had begun homeschooling years ago. It would have been the best situation. DD will not leave school now even though she is not happy there. We are allowing her, as a 7th grader, to make this choice. We are looking at other options for next year.
I asked DD today if acceleration was a good idea. She said “maybe”. I asked if she felt that the kids she was with now learned slowly like they did when she was in her age grade (her reality). She complained “There are a lot of stupid kids at school.” She is not known for tact for sure, but what it points out is that just because one moves up a grade doesn’t mean that the pace is any quicker.
