I've participated in or run many such meetings. When done well, the objective actually is to create solutions to the problem.
I agree with much of what geofizz wrote, though I would also be careful about reacting to "kids like this", as some aspects of the experience of a school-based team may actually be applicable to your child, even though the likelihood that they have had a student exactly like him in the past is quite small. Instead, I would redirect such phrasing into specific questions about supporting the named needs, like, "in your experience, what has been effective for supporting children with [anxiety, poor work completion, etc.] in the past?" "When children are able to demonstrate mastery of the content standards in on-demand testing, what are the options available to the teachers for adjusting course grades to reflect content knowledge, rather than organization and work skills?"
Perhaps you can tell that my inclination would be to work on two prongs:
1. identifying the obstacles to work completion, and supporting the emotional or other needs related to them.
2. reducing the impact on his access to mid- and long-term goals (i.e., grades), through accommodations to the grading process that slant toward standards-based grading, rather than process and compliance grading. IOW, grade based on his classroom performance, test, and project scores, not the absence of his homework. (Where I work, school policy is that homework cannot be the reason for a student failing a class. Although all students are expected to complete it, from a grading standpoint, homework can be used to raise grades, but not to lower them.)
