Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Parenting and Advocacy Experience With "Student Led Conferences" ???

My dd's 9 yo (current 4th grader) school does student led conferences. I've learned that if I have something more important to discuss I schedule a separate conference, which they recommend.

I honestly didn't like them at first, I viewed them as a complete waste of time and didn't feel they were beneficial. But then I saw how much my dd enjoyed showing me her work, their work on the walls, how the classroom is organized and functions (there is a portion of the conference where she gives a tour of the classroom) and I changed my opinion. It gives my dd a sense of pride and she enjoys it. I think it also gives them a more active and responsible role in their learning.

That said, last year was a rough year in terms of dd being challenged in her self-contained gifted class. She was bored in math and hated school. At spring listening conferences dd and I sat down with her teacher and dd put the teacher on the spot. The students are supposed to write down anything they want to talk about about a week before the conferences and dd was QUITE prepared. She had prepared a list of things to ask and had rebuttals prepared for the teacher's answers, she was like a lawyer. It wasn't at all disrespectful, she just questioned how math was being taught and why she was being made to repeat things she already showed mastery on... Etc... I was floored and at one point I think I was turned and looking straight at dd with my mouth open (we sit side by side with the teacher across the table). Dd was advocating for herself and was doing an amazing job of showing the flaws in the math program. I honestly came in to that listening conference expecting to hear the usual song and dance. And to this day I'm sure the teacher thinks I put dd up to it.

Sadly nothing really came of it, the teacher's answers were basically non-answers and I knew things wouldn't change. I felt so proud of dd but at the same time so sad for her because she didn't get any answers or the change she was hoping for. I did tell her that she did so well advocating for herself and that just because it didn't change anything that she shouldn't stop advocating for herself.

Three years ago if somebody were to tell me that dd would speak up to an adult and express how she feels, or question them, I wouldn't have believed them. My kid used to stare at the wall with her back to the class and never participated. In addition to the benefits she gets from her G&T class, I think the way her school involves them in the learning process and encourages them to be responsible for their learning has made a difference with her. She's much more confident and outspoken.