DD has a way of not looking ASD even though IMO she has a ton of things about her that subtly show it. She does not meet the criteria if we look at them in a formal sense. Most importantly, she is highly functional socially, even popular. But man, there are a lot of things about her that fit.
True for DS here, as well. He is very funny and gregarious and was always admired in elementary school for his wit. In MS, he has friends he pals around with and is very invested in his friendships, although they are a bit odd in that he only wants to interact with them at school
DeeDee is the expert, so I'll just parrot her advice: I'd specifically want ADOS. That's how DS was finally diagnosed, in the end. IQ patterns and other instruments supported the diagnosis, but not would not have been diagnostic in and of themselves.
It matters because treatment is different for a neurobiological disorder and an purely psychiatric disorder. I wouldn't expect a regular psychologist to understand how gifted/ASD might present.
CBT is good for this type of thing--also mindfulness. Poor DD, it is hard to imagine they are worrying all the time and we have no idea!
