And I'll reiterate that the 100-150 library items estimate is no joke. We did that, too. Until DD was about 10yo, we usually had a running total of 125 items out in any given week. Not kidding. I had a special box for DD to put them in, and to keep track of them, I had rules about where library books/items could be used (never outside the house, except for occasional in the car use, and never into bedrooms, only the public downstairs areas). We never lost one, I'm amazed to say.
It doesn't slow down much with age, I agree. At 3, books are a wonderful tool for easing transitions. If I am honest, I'd characterize them as our domestic currency. DS will negotiate anywhere from 5 to 10 books at each of these times: waking in the morning, eating brunch, settling for nap, dinner, and settling for bed. (I love snuggling and reading, so there are no complaints from me!) We have a personal collection of about 400-500 books for DS (this is where our discretionary spending money that used to go to my wardrobe goes), so that gives us some variety. Wherever we go, I ensure we have a half dozen new library books to read.
As an anecdote, I remember visiting my in-laws for Thanksgiving the year DS turned 2. We were staying overnight and I packed a backpack with all of our clothes and filled a wheeled suitcase with 40lbs of books. MIL looked at it like I was crazy, but conceded the next day that DS had obviously needed the books, because that was the way he asked to spend all his time.
As for play dates, I haven't bothered much until now, mostly because I despise the topics of conversation at most of those groups. Children learn prosocial skills from adults, and DS has two engaged playmates in DH and me. DS has one good friend, an age peer boy who is likely gifted, and we have a standing weekly play date for him. I'm creating a mixed age play group at our church in the hope of gaining DS access to some of the age peers' older siblings. Save your effort for now, I say.
