Who else has kids like this? This is a very common theme with my DD. She really just can't seem to stand the fact that she is still a minor and has to follow the rules that society places on her as a minor. It absolutely makes her nuts. She says things like "Well, I have the right to life and liberty! It's a free country!" with some frequency. You really have to remind her again and again that we are still the humans in charge around here. It's sort of funny, but at the same time, it freaks me out just a tad. She isn't devious/serious enough for this strong emotion to be of great concern to me--but she is 8. (Mind you, I don't think she wants to do bad things, exactly. She just wants to be in charge of herself. She just went to sleepaway camp for a week and had a blast. She has always been a really, really independent kid.)
Lest we sound really controlling...she has a pretty good amount of freedom, actually, though we aren't permissive with things like screens and junk food. I don't know if that's what she wants, though. Probably not. She basically just wants to...live her own life, I think.
Ultra, we have found with my DS who has AS that he really doesn't grasp the social hierarchy that the rest of us intuitively understand. He used to find it outrageous that teachers would boss him around; he didn't grasp that their social role entitles them to do that. Likewise, if he really wants to do something and we say no, he doesn't deep down understand that because we are his parents, and the reigning adults in the household, we have a right to deny his request.
For DS, this isn't necessarily wanting to be a grownup faster, or even have more autonomy-- it's failure to understand that social roles convey rights and responsibilities, and often convey power of one person over another.
DeeDee
