Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums General Discussion Violence & the YSP

No, not in the least. She's the kind of sweet-natured girl who carries home injured millipedes and tries to nurse them back to health (and cries when she fails). I can't imagine her hurting another child, much less doing something violent enough to end up in the news.

Anyway, thanks for the very practical advice. I do tend to get mired in the technical details of things.

Aw, thanks. She is very well loved.

But let's just say that a parent of a previously "violent" child did want to apply for DYS. I would probably think they would try anyways. They would probably not initial/sign that question and then stick an extra piece of paper on saying why and what has been done since the original incident, etc etc. perhaps including a doctor's note explaining etc etc

That is possible, yes? I would think some parents will still try because ... but then once DYS gets the application and reads over everything, they can decide based on that particular situation. ?

I'm pretty sure it was an unintended construction. If it is not, very few parents could ever attest to that their child "never demonstrated or threatened violence, harm, or other behavior that is grossly inappropriate toward any other person." For example, if "grossly inappropriate" does not modify "demonstrated or threatened harm," most parents could not sign the form because most kids have at some point hit a parent in frustration and/or said "I'm so mad I'm going to hit you." That's how I view it anyway!

But of course if you are worried that your answer is not honest, I would certainly add any explanations you feel necessary concerning that yes/no question. (Put a star by your answer and say "see attached.")

This post has been edited since it was clearly taken the wrong way.

Gratefulmom, I think I've made it fairly clear that I am not in the process of applying, nor am I at all likely to apply in the near future. I also think I've made it clear that I'm not going to be lying on the application if I do apply.

And I really don't see how you could interpret what I've said as indicating that my child needs extra supervision around other children or that her presence would create a distraction/safety issue. That is obviously not the case.

Wow. I think this thread has been throw out of proportion. I don't think Gratefulmom is implementing you in her statement just her concern of potential cover up by any parent and clearly you have no plans to cover anything up, hence your question that started the thread. I read Gratefulmom's post as an argument for full disclosure of anything even if you consider it small because the experts at DYS might find value in the information as they provide service for the child(ren).

And as for the potential safety issues ... let's be realistic. We put our children at 'risk' every time we allow them to play on a public playground or send them to school. It's nice that DYS has allowed for this concern but most places don't.

Katelyn's Mom, thank you very very much for clarifying. That is exactly what I was hoping to convey.

No5, I am terribly sorry that you took my post so personally. I thought you were asking about the interpretation of this question on the DYS form, and I thought I was adding to this discussion with my general thoughts. It certainly was not an assessment of your particular child.

I am not even remotely interested in drama and find it upsetting to be the target of another person's angst, so I removed my post. My intent and desire is for all of us to be supportive of each other. I recognize that forums like this where we don't personally know each other makes it too easy to misinterpret our communications with each other.

It is possible that I overreacted. I'm a bit sleep-deprived today. Okay, I am a lot sleep-deprived today. I did read your "you" as referring to me, and I did find it offensive to be urged to be honest for the protection of other children in light of all of the above. But if you meant it in a more general sense, I can certainly agree that honesty is the best policy.

I completely understand! When I was writing, I did try not to use "you," but when I read it again before I deleted it, I did see that I had left one in. I did mean "you" in a general way.

For what it's worth, I don't think you personally have anything to worry about with your daughter on this issue. I also encourage you to apply to the program when she's old enough. We've found the support and the people we've met (via online so far) to be very beneficial.

'Hope you have a great day!