Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums General Discussion lack of services and emotional disturbance?

[quote=san54]Dear Fellow Members,

I'd appreciate hearing from those of you on this question: In your opinion/experience, can misplacement (lack of any services) cause emotional stress, anxiety, cause emotinal disturbance, thus an ED classification?

Have you seen emotional disturbance lessen when your child has been placed in the correct setting, on his/her intellectual level with true peers? Thank you. [quote=san54]


YES!!
I can tell you that my dd7 was in a private school for K4 and about 3 months of K5. She went in knowing the majority of the curiculum, but because she was "active" she was assumed to be ADHD and "low average". She ended up hitting and allegedly biting out of frustration. This school recommended intensive psychotherapy. We went to one session and the psychologist recommended moving her ASAP or getting her some acceleration, particularly in reading.

We moved her to a public school where they acelerated her in reading and allowed her to read at "rest time", etc. No more behavior issues!!!

She is now in 1st grade and doing well with a great teacher that seems to "get her". Had we attempted to stay at the private school, I fear what would have happened with dd.

Another mom here who has her DS6 in counseling so he can deal with a poor school situation and his increasing frustration. Right now there are not any other options (besides homeschooling-- but I just can't make that sacrifice to my own life right now) but we are in the process of applying to a new private school for GT children that will open next fall.

When my son in engaged in appropriate work and when he attended a few weeks of a summer camp for GT children these same behaviors that now require counseling were not present at all.

If they level out by the 3rd grade, then why don't they level out emotionally, too?

I would caution anyone who would approach the school for accomodations based on this not to go it alone. I would recommend first consulting with a child psychologist who is experienced with issues of HG/PG.

I would obtain an educational advocate to make sure the laws locally will help not hinder your efforts. Also, this person may have professional experience to share about how similar efforts were received by the school.

Be prepared for the school to possibly assert that the emotional problems are intrinsic to the child, even the cause of the home situation and the school has not caused any of it.

Personally, I would be very careful asserting anything like this to any school administrator/teacher unless I was already ahead of the game in planning and ready for things to possible become adversarial. Plan for the worst and hope for the best.



good luck.

for sure with my 6th grader and it is documented in articles I have found on hoagies about the social emotional risks. It does not give diagnossi in the article but does discuss it. we ended up taking our son out of district and having him at a great montessori school for 4 years until we could feel comfortable that the middle school where there was a half day gifted program, would meet his needs. You could say he needs to be with his peers to feel comfortable. My kid was getting bulued in the mixed classes and they did not see that he was a target due to his 2E profile.

It is true but it is very hard to make progress in that area unless youhave expamples of inappropriate behavior that is being done to him by teachers or other students that you can prove. We chose to take him out of the school, I went back to work to afford the tution .... It was worth it since they will not easily agree to being the cause.

Hi San,
I'm wondering if you had said that a poor placement makes a kid sad and stressed if she would have been so defensive.

I mean, what, exactly is an 'emotionally disturbed state," anyway?

To me, the fact that she believes that most kids even out by 3rd grade, tells me that she can't see the color 'Gifted.' If she can't see it, then she it doesn't exist for her. No wonder the IQ tests seem meaningless.

Sad that things went that way. Reminds me of 25 years ago hearing folks say: "Where are the female Mozarts and Einstiens? Of course Males are smarter than Females." That really is how the world looked within my lifetime.
((shrugs))
grinity

As for emotionally disturbed behavior, I find the "blame the victim" attitude very upsetting, which is what happened to us 15 yrs. ago. It hurts to have one's parenting under suspicion. We were the most nurturing family we could be. The principal and team knew his iq was 153, that he scored in the 98th percentile, was underachieving for report card grades, yet not one professional offered to give him accelerated work or to change anything they were dong. He was merely viewed as an inconvenience. The principal ran the gifted program and said only kids who did homework were allowed in it. An ED classification was given to our son because he was hiding under his desk in the 3rd grade, having panic attacks with shaking, hated school up through 8th grade, and threw fits at home over school, and began to fear contamination and peer poisoning. Once in the sci tech high school, these symptoms went away. The "blame the victim" attitude was what I seemed to be getting from this teacher(not my son's.) Thank you. All answers have been so helpful. --San

The fear of contamination and peer poisoning made me think of this story I read recently.

School children have tried to poison their classmate at a primary school in Hamburg because she was too smart, daily Express reported this week.

http://www.thelocal.de/society/20081218-16221.html

Inky, this is horrible but thank you for sharing this. I remember reading that gifted children often worry about the world's woes and possess high sensitivity. This was true in our son's case...worrying about global miseries. I'm sure many in this forum have experienced this sensitivity. - San

Yeah!
In first grade there was a presentation about the Ozone Layer that terrified DS12 for many years. We didn't even know until 3 years later when treating the dog's ear's with hydrogen peroxide. DS started sobbing and pleading with us not to destroy the ozone layer. Breaks my heart to think how frightened he had been for 3 years without even really getting the details right.

Then there is the idea that maybe he's perfectly correct to be worried, and I'm crazy to 'keep it on the back burner.'

Smiles,
Grinity