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    Joined: Dec 2005
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    Grinity Offline OP
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    I saw this on a different topic, and wanted to be sure it didn't get lost in the shuffle:

    Originally Posted by Ania
    Hi Cym :
    I know for sure that one of the reasons he is doing so well is tha fact that he has been challenged since he was a toddler. He loves challenges and is not afraid of them. But it is becoming more and more difficult to challenge him by myslef. Sometimes I thing I should take my kids to Europe for a year and have them do English online while atending a school there. With the incident at VT this past week I have been quite emotional, and all the things that are usually hidden deep inside me are beginning to pop up again. I am furious at the educational system in this country , I am furious at the parents, I am furious at the values that I am constantly exposing my kids to. I am furious at myself for not knowing what to do next!
    Sorry, needed to vent!

    Ania


    Ania, sweet,
    I can totally understand you wanting to run - there are some real, serious problems with the culture and the educational system here. I always find a view from the outside helpful. Do you want to say more? I'm tired and sad today, too.

    Trinity


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    thanks for bringing this to the forum.

    This has hit us on many levels.

    It hurts to see children (they are all still kids) who are striving hard to succeeed suffer due to our society's inability to manage mental illness.

    It hurts to know that 32 people with great potential for mankind have been destroyed.

    It is scary to think of sending my boys off to school not knowing what lunatic might be lurking in their lives.

    It is scary to think of sendning Rite off to college at 16. How will he respond in a situation like that. We are actually having those discussions. I resent having to have those discussions with my child.

    It is a harsh reality that we are not "safe" and we must be aware and responsive to our environments just like people in Israel, Iraq, etc. We are too complacent and naive.

    It is hard sending my Asian, only minorities in their classrooms, into the world when there is open hostility right now. At least with the open hostility, though, we can be more prepared.

    I resent that fear has to be part of their learning time.

    I simply wish Cho had never happened. I wish a simple hug would have cured what ailed him. I wish humans were not so complex and frightening.



    Willa Gayle
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    Well, I don't know that I want to run, but maybe take a breather :-) We have so much here in this country and yet we have so little...
    I do not think that I have the energy to dump everything off my back as off yet. I will do it in stages. So today is part number one ;-)

    The events of the last week have proven to me that I do not need a satellite dish. Bye, bye - we are going to miss discovery channel only, but there are videos. To calm my mind I have been cleaning like crazy over the last few days. It takes a while to clean 5,000 square foot house ! Of course my house is way too big, but everyone here in the west has a house like that ! Will I be more content moving back to Amsterdam, living in a two bedroom flat and commuting using my bike? I might be, if the flat overlooks one of the canals:-)
    Last Friday I was reading a piece in Popular Science about a cross country trip of two americans in a new Smart by Mercedes. Did you see that car? A tiny thing, just for two, extremely good gas mileage. I have seen this car a few years ago while visiting Florence, even took a couple of pictures. Too small for me at this stage of my life, as I still have two kids to take places, but in six years might consider. So I am reading the piece while seating in my midsize car outside of my kid's school waiting for the dismissal bell . In a few minutes a huge Toyota pick up parks to my left, Hummer to my right and a minivan in front of me. Could not see anything, had to get out of my car so my daughter could see where I was parked. There went my dream about the Smart, as I imagined myself driving it and being smashed by the Hummer parked to my right (nice, burgundy colour).
    How expensive does the gasoline has to get in order for us in the US to realize that we do not need "houses on wheels"? (For the record, my second car IS a minivan)

    There is no talk, and there isn't to be, about "gun culture" in US. But there was a talk yesterday on NPR about a woman somewhere , who is trying to prevent the practice of free wireless internet in cities from spreading . Her argument? Kids will have unrestricted access to porn sites. Well, as far as I am concerned I would rather have my ten year old see some naked bodies than to have a gun pointed at her . And I am not pro porn! I am just seeing a lesser evil!
    Unlike Willa, the VT incident has not make me afraid to send my kids to school. Thank God! But I worry about living in country where we have so much and want even more, without realizing the destructive power of our society. I want my kids to view the world from a different perspective. How do you accomplish that?
    Ania

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    Hi Ania -
    The car thing defines and reflects so much of who we are! I remember when I traded in my SUV for a small sedan, my DH, who also has an SUV is amazed that I could prefer a smaller car. I told him I was sick of driving around inside a thing with more cubic feet of space than most people have in their homes! But that would mean taking a worldwide perspective, wouldn't it?

    I was also saddened when the new Pokemon game came out. I was there with DS10, at 6am, to be sure he got his game. He had done "jobs" of all kinds, including emptying the dishwasher for 10 cents, learning vocabular words, 10 cents each, and "Handwriting without tears" - including some tears, for about a penny a minute. I was delighted to have a big enough motivator to get some "extras" in, and let him "early earliness minutes" after he had the money to get me out of bed earlier. All and all I was happy, until I got there and saw the other parents, who were there sleepy-eyed, with or without their boys, clearly picking up one or both of these games with no thought to even the pretense of the child using their "own money" or "own effort."

    I consider that I was quite generous, and explained this to DS, in comparison to what my own parents would have done. He explained to me that he wasn't alive at that time, and while he appreciates that it's a strech for me, he feels that he should be compared to his lazy, spoiled, good-for-nothing peers. I'm not worried about my kid, but I do feel sorry for those other boys in line. There is something wonderful about setting a goal, working for it, and reaping to much coveted rewards. I fear that with Globalization of the Economy these same kids may well be living in their SUVs someday. ((shrug)) Maybe that won't be so bad, but I wonder who my kid is going to want to hang around with as these kids grow up?

    I do think that volunteering helps. Maybe TV programs like the Trump reality show to see a different perspective about how people work together? Books and travel and friendships broaden one. Political action, letter writing, visits to the state capitol. In some way, I'm hoping that my son seeing me advocate for him and other gifted kids will "rub off" on him the idea that if something needs to be fixed, one talks and talks and talks about it with everyone one can find. He knows that I spend time here because I care about all of us and our families, I hope that helps....but mostly - I pray, because it's bigger than any one family.


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    Originally Posted by Ania
    Unlike Willa, the VT incident has not make me afraid to send my kids to school. Thank God! But I worry about living in country where we have so much and want even more, without realizing the destructive power of our society. I want my kids to view the world from a different perspective. How do you accomplish that?
    Ania

    My children are Asian. That's why I am scared right now. They are of Indian origin and actually have a Hispanic or an Arab look, but whenever there is some event involving racial violence, the comments and threats tend to pick up in their primarily caucasian populated schools.

    That's why I fear for them. I do call the principals and multicultural liasons whenever something like this happens and ask them what they are doing to protect the minorities while the heat is up.



    Willa Gayle
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    Part II
    My kids go to school with a lot of Hispanic kids. The school's charter is Spanish, hence... I love for them to be able to see that the world is not all Caucasian (oterwise, we live in a VERY white state). One of the teacher's Asian, a lot are Hispanics , 50% of the faculty speaks with an accent. Why most of the parents in this country would consider this a disadvantage? I am mad at the parents!
    Ania

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    Grinity Offline OP
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    I wish that there was more acutate information availible to help parent make judgements about schools. I'd personally like to see numbers of kids participating in academic competitions, number of kids grade and subject accelerated....things like that.
    Trinity


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