Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums General Discussion Our local public high school

Well, our school, while competitive, is not in the same leagues being discussed here. However, there are certainly kids that fit these descriptions. DDs middle school academic-team teammates who were fixated on winning medals, because it would look good on their college app, for example. Or the kids who are admonished or punished by their parents for less than acceptable performance, be it academic or otherwise.

However, not all the kids are like this, and at least here, it is possible for them to co-exist. DD considers them friends, but is able to distance herself and step back from the easily recognizable craziness. (While a couple kids were fixated on getting medals, she and some others were worrying about what crazy hats they wanted to wear, or what to bring to the swap meet.) If one can maintain perspective and balance, admittedly not always easy, I think one may be able to enjoy the benefits of the opportunities and peers and stay out of the fray. And at least so far, I do believe my DD is truly happy.

As the economy shrinks and competition for jobs increases, more families (and children) may be in "survival mode."

Well said.

Aha. Here we go. Here, preschool classes (up to age 6-8, depending on the place) are strictly by age, not skill or experience. I think it's supposed to make classes accessible, but it really just eliminates anyone who didn't start by 2.5.

Are the kids happy? Yeah, I think they are. The big downside is that they have to specialize so terribly young, so by first grade you know which extracurricular is for you and you'll never be able to catch up in the rest. It means kids don't get the practice in making their own life decisions that is so important in college, at least not in these areas. The upside is that many kids, my generalists included, have at least one skill developed to an impressive level. When my first grader wrote and self-published a kid's book for NaNoWriMo, she didn't stand out - the others had achievements just as high, they had just spent more than a month getting to them. Parents actually seem more relaxed about seeing *some* sort of impressiveness in other kids, and just cultivate their own kids' specialty in response.

Well said.

I think there is a "g" (general) factor for sports, just as there is one for intelligence. An implication of this is that children with athletic talent should not be discouraged from starting a sport "late", because their talent may enable them to surpass children who started earlier.

A young woman from a middle class background that did not permit private tennis lessons gave lessons to our children. I asked her when she started playing, and she said she started tennis in middle school but had been playing other sports. She was on her high school tennis team and earned a tennis scholarship for college.

Are there other gyms you could try? My DD has bounced around among four of them before she settled on this one.

Way back when DD did dance, they were organized by age, too, but the teacher approached us and announced her intent to bump DD up to the next age group with the next session. It was all about maturity... DD was paying attention and taking direction far better than the other 4yos.

DD dropped it, though, once she had her first recital and endured having her hair in a BUN!!

Eh, at this point my kids aren't interested anymore. It's more a commentary on the weird, weird world we live in. The older one no longer wants any lessons at all except occasional music tutoring; the younger wants private lessons on-demand that don't impact her regular schedule. They like who they are, and know that learning anything they want takes just a little effort. What more can I ask?

This is why I'm sending my teenager to camp to hike in the wilderness this summer instead of all summer long SAT prep like his friends. Get him away from all the madness and get perspective on life, learn to be self sufficient, disconnect from his electronics and lower his stress significantly.

That is a great gift you are giving to your DS.