Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums General Discussion DD is SUCH a spaz...

deleting

DS6 came home from camp yesterday covered from head-to-toe in strawberry yogurt, the result of a lunch malfunction.

So, I hear you

My heart goes out to her! Your post shows several strong positives including her concern over whether others might get hurt, and her reflection about where things may have gone wrong and what she might do differently next time.

On one hand, anyone can have an occasional experience which turns into a comedy of errors. With practiced storytelling it can become a classic. On the other hand, she may not be very body-aware, and this lack of spatial awareness, along with inability to predict what will happen next, and inclination to divulge detail, may be possible signs of autistic spectrum disorder (ASD). Then again, it could just be symptomatic of being 6.

Because she seems concerned about friendships, she may enjoy having conversations with you over books with friendship tips, such as the children's books from Magination Press, free spirit publishing, and prufrock press.

Have you read the book, A Parent's Guide to Gifted Children? It provides insightful support for understanding, nurturing, and coaching gifted kids.

I understand that you probably didn't mean it this way, because of a difference between usage in British and American English, but please, in case any readers ever visit the UK or talk to British people, be aware that the term "spaz" is EXTREMELY offensive in British English. Really, extremely. I'm kind of shaking even though I know about the dialect thing.

http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spastic

I personally am a huge fan of the term "Froot Loop" to describe my child (lovingly) under similar circumstances, but "dork" works pretty well here too. Let's just say that I've seen similar things from her. Oy. The baby-oiling-of-the-cat-and-then-attempting-to-hide-the-evidence-with-a-kitty-bath incident. {cringe}

Because, see, it really does happen that there are times when SOME kind of term like this is necessary, but drawing parallels to another disadvantaged group probably isn't it, as Colinsmum notes.

I run in social circles where the term is reasonably offensive, and I live in N. America. The "R" word and all of its slang permutations is similarly offensive to many Americans. I can't speak for Brits on that one.

I was also distressed by the term (Australia), but I think that's been covered. One more thing to consider is whether your child is hypermobile and/or has low muscle tone. This can really impact on their body awareness & control, that plus gifted and, shall we say "quirky" thinking, is a recipe for what you have described. Not that I have three of them or anything.

My youngest child is exceptionally prone to clumsiness unless giving her body her full attention - so she's highly UNLIKELY to have serious accidents climbing trees, falling off things, etc and has had less emergency room visits than her sisters (in fact none, compared to the middle child who was an ER frequent flier). BUT she falls off her chair, over her own feet, over other people's feet, walking from kitchen to dining table.... Her nanny, her father and I seem to be the only people who are aware of this because most other adults see her where she IS concentrating on her body and thus seems fine, but it really did take us a long time to realise we didn't need to be terrified every time she ran, or walked the top of a fence, given how incapable she is of just walking without incident.

I tend to use "klutz" for physical clumsiness, and "ditz" for mental out-to-lunch-ness.

I remember walking in on DD when she was 3, to find the 4-foot-tall teddy bear on the changing pad. She was holding his feet in the air with one hand and using the other to uncap the Vaseline. I'm glad I wasn't 30 seconds later, when the cleanup job would have been much more involved.

That wikipedia entey covered it quite well. Doesn't sound offensive to me.

Anyway, the example story from the bathroom was very sweet. I reallyliked what Indigo pointed out.

My son is very obviously physically clumsy (sensory seeking) and people are always worried that he is hurting himself. He also was diagnosed with asd, and is truly socially inept sometimes. :P I have to explain alot of social stuff to him. Helikes people... he just has weird ways of showing it. Often people feel put off by him unfortunately. Even people that he likes and wants to keep around. He's still young though! I figure that I have years to teach him this stuff. I hope!

So interesting that a term of loving acceptance here is so unkind somewhere else.
We use the term "dippy-do." We all have dippy-do moments at our house and it is a-okay!

So, what I'm taking from this is that the lawsuit for defamation should be brought in England, and not the United States.