Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums General Discussion Does/did your DD have ( boy > girl) friends?

I have observed that my DD has more friendships with boys than girls. It is starting to even out now @9.5 but I wonder if others here have observed something similar.

Interested in hearing about your experiences and observations.

DD8's best friend is a boy from school who is about a year older, and there is a neighborhood boy that she plays with regularly, but she hangs out more with girls at school. The boy that she hangs out with tends to like hanging out with girls. That being said, DD has never had much interest in "girly" things like dolls and can be a tomboy with climbing trees, roughhousing, etc. So she can go either way. She does love jewelry, bling, high heels(just trying them on, I don't let her wear them), craft projects, etc so she can go either way and she finds plenty to do with girls as well as boys. She has loved games like Minecraft since she was in preschool and so far we have only found one or two girls that have any interest.

All but a couple of my DD's close friends in the past decade have been male.

My D just wants to be friends with smart people... gender does not matter and never has to her.

DD6 loves girly things but interesting enough has always connected with boys more. She starts out chatting to the girls but then she tires of them or they of her and she gravitates to the boys. Loves chasing them, trying to match their capabilites in sports, chess etc. Funny enough the boys don't seem to tire of her and in fact we have had funny experiences with a few boys really getting attached to her.

We just got back from vacation in the UK during which she met a boy at the local school park. Next thing I know he started showing up everyday at my MIL's house looking for her. Funny how he is my DS's age (older) but was coming to play with DD!

DD9 plays very well with boys and girls alike, but when she's actively seeking friends, she reaches out to girls. The boys have always been family members, siblings of her friends, etc.

This was me too. I was definitely a tomboy. This may date me slightly, but when I was in elementary school we would always play "Star Wars" at recess and since I was the only girl playing with the boys they wanted me to be Princess Leia so they could "rescue" me. It would make me so mad because I was much more suited to being Han Solo or even Luke, so I would cave to being Leia every once in a while if they agreed I could be Han or Luke the next day. All through my life I've always had more guy friends than girl friends, which has led to some awkward situations like when your high school or college buddy starts hitting on you or asks you out and you completely view him as a brother-figure.

Both my girls have friends that are boys and I encourage them to play with the boys. When they come home from school and tell me about all the drama going on with the girls that is the first thing I tell them - go play with the boys! DD10 probably plays with the boys more just because she doesn't have much interest in the "girly" things the girls are doing and some of the girls in her class are not very nice. DD8 is very social and has lots of girl friends, but the girls in her class are over the top drama for such a young age. There is just something about the dynamics of her age group that creates constant turmoil amongst the girls (maybe too many chiefs or however that saying goes). The teachers and school counselor have even mentioned how much drama there is with the girls in DD8's class.

I hope they both continue to have friend type relationships with the boys. I view having friends of the opposite sex as very beneficial in life - based on my life experiences.

My DD10 has friends of both sexes but during preschool and K mostly played with boys. I think she would have continued that trend except there are some unwritten rules at school that boys play with boys and girls play with girls. Her closest friends have been boys with one exception and it is still easier for her to make new friends (e.g. summer camp) with boys. I think this is because she is very athletic and, more importantly, she doesn't like to talk that much. Making friends with girls requires more talking and social skills whereas she can make friends more easily by joining the boys for a soccer or dodgeball game.

DD8 is about half and half, I think, though the friends she talks about most from school are boys.

My oldest son 10 plays entirely with boys, and his twin sister essentially entirely with girls. Their interests are also very stereotypical, and have been since they were very little -- back then we were put trucks and dolls down in between them just to see what they'd play with.

Perhaps this is partly a boy-girl twin thing.

Their younger brother 8 has some girl friends at school, but even he gravitates more towards boys and typical boy interests.

At all schools the kids have been at, there has been a lot of gender self-segregation in play, at least since K.

I'm interested that it not so for so many respondents. I wonder if people are less likely to reply if their answer is more in keeping with stereotypes.