Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums General Discussion could lack of "screen time" be a bad thing?

Portia, when my kids friends were all about star wars I assumed they'd seen the films. No, just like Disney princess talk it's more about how they play aroundwiththe archetypes than being experts on the source material.
yes yes yes yes yes yes.

My aim is to help my kids learn to regulate themselves around technology, so that they become adults who use it in appropriate ways. Prohibiting it altogether stands in the way of this aim. So does allowing overuse. We are treading a middle road in our house...

My husband has ADHD too and he didn't get too much screen time. He does have dysgraphia and was labeled a school "loser," (even with the diagnosis) which resulted in him emotionally dropping out and about 20 years of depression, which he is over. He's doing great now, but he did lose a lot of time.

I don't credit screen time with his problems. I wish his parents were better advocates, but I don't believe they had it in them. My daughter is very much like him, with better parent advocates only because we've seen the problems firsthand.

We don't watch much television, but I don't know what we'd do without screen time. I don't want to push my (kindergarten) daughter at home, nor do I want to advocate for her strengths at school because I want to be able to advocate for her weaknesses (writing and drawing).

The iPad and computer provide really fun ways for her to work at her own pace and make her own choices without parental involvement. Games/apps she likes include Brain Pop, Lumosity, Mystery Math Town, Reading Rainbow, Code Academy, Starfall, ToonTalk, and Grammar Jammar. She also does a lot of research. The question of the day yesterday was when the first cigarette was invented and whether you could smoke on the moon. Sometimes she asks me for help finding answers, but we also find she can actually look things up in Google even though she can't spell. The Chrome browser fills in words pretty well.

She is also allowed to watch free TV on Amazon Prime and play with mind numbing games. The rule is that she can't spend too much time on mind numbing stuff. So if she starts to do that, I just say enough with the iPad. In addition, we've talked a lot about addiction and how gaming companies can tweak games to encourage addictive behaviors and how the in-app "buy now" button is a warning to "click the x and get out of there."

I feel like these devices allow her access more information and to teach herself to the extent that she wants to. I don't feel like a pushy mom and because it is fun, she's learning without me feeling like I'm supplementing when she needs free time.

I do keep my ears open, especially with Brain Pop and the individual research (just like I pay a lot of attention to the books she reads). If something seems off content-wise, I redirect. Also, using an iPad at a restaurant or at the playground...we just don't do that. I think there is a difference between not using a device inappropriately and not using a device at all.

thank you all for your experiences and thoughtful responses. Considering my husband and many of our friends are in STEM fields, we certainly feel a bit unconventional at times. Phey, I have the same feelings as you illustrated in your post!
But I am realizing that letting them have some free rein on the computers/Ipad will not turn them into electronic zombies if managed correctly.

I was also concerned that having kids to online "work" would create less interest and focus on doing work on paper, such as homework, but perhaps this silly assumption?

Can any of you give recommendations on good parental control software for Macs? thanks!

There is really nothing to be offended about. Every parent is entitled to their own opinions on childrearing. Personally, my children has unlimited screen time but the two younger ones are already ten. I find that they are very interested in learning and the internet in particular provides a way for them to teach themselves whatever they wish to learn. These kids also read a lot and don't necessarily choose screen time over books. I also find that it is another way for them to learn to make decisions, including how to allocate their time and schedule in what they need to do (homework, practice, etc.) Having written all that, I just need to add that I did limit screen time at much younger ages (until around age 7 or so) in order to establish the reading habit and encourage development of other skills. I also felt that they did not have the self-discipline or judgment to not over-indulge at younger ages.

Back to your question, the lack of screen time could be a bad thing if it removes an avenue of learning for your child. Screen time is also helpful for strengthening of friendships since that's how my kids communicate with their classmates/friends.

This really depends so much on the child in question that I don't think you can judge what will work for another family.

I know kids who would literally let the screen suck their lives away and others who need to be pried away to work on their social skills (usually teenagers). My daughter is good at self regulating and dealing with some things (Minecraft, Dr. Who), but not others (anything Disney TV -- now forbidden in our house). She's good about being present for her friends, but some of her friends aren't. When she had a backyard "camping" sleepover last summer, she insisted on a no devices rule for her guests and herself. And since I didn't let them in the house except to use the bathroom, there was no TV either.

Before we had our daughter, we decided that we would absolutely not have screen time or use TV as a babysitter (said with all the smug assurance of people who don't have kids yet). After we had her, we found ourselves saying things like "sweetie, wouldn't you like to sit still for a few minutes and watch a show with us... maybe give us all a break?"

Amen!! Some lessons only experience can teach.

Screentime close to bedtime and having a computer in a child's room have been found to negatively affect sleep.

I do give my kids to some screen media in part to give them social capital. They were much more limited as young toddlers. I really think there is too much crucial brain growth happening at 0-3 to spend vast chunks of time in front of a screen. It may not be so bad, but we have very little data.

We have had screen media feel in and out of balance here. We had a game that really obsessed the kids for a while, and they pestered us a lot about playing it. I think they would have played 2+ hours a day if allowed (the game really is addictive, even for adults). Not cool with me. OTOH, they are not very interested in TV at all.

And it is possible to not do TV with a toddler. DD got virtually zero TV till, I don't know, 4? DS got some after age 2--more than I liked, actually--because my needed work time was more than my available daycare time.

My ex also has ADHD (diagnosed as a child, and again as an adult) so we didn't let DD have screen time at all until she was 2.5. Sadly, she's still about the most ADHD kid you ever met, but I'd say she came by it fairly enough given her genetics. All that said, it certainly never hurt her to not have access to screened devices as a young child. I can't actually think of any way it would have benefited her to have screen time. From 2.5 to 3.5 she got to watch TV about half an hour per day, and since then her interaction with TV and computers has really been low and sporadic. However, minimal screen access has not prevented her from learning age-appropriate computer skills.

FWIW mobile devices are so incredibly user-friendly that my son learned to fully operate our android tablet in a few hours, just after turning 3, before he could read. He also had no screen time until after age 2, and has only since age 3.5 been allowed to use the computer sporadically to access edutainment.

I honestly don't feel like gifted kids have any greater need to access screen time than other kids most of the time. On days my daughter (then 7) was not in summer camp and I was working at home last year, it was handy for me to let her play on dreambox or codeacademy for a couple hours at a time. But that was all about the circumstances at play.