The diagnosis doesn't drive the services-- the child's needs are supposed to drive the services. You can't say there's a standard "Asperger's package" of services-- the IEP is individual and has to be based on data about the individual child's capabilities and deficits.
That mom can request a Functional Behavior Analysis from the district-- it does sound like the child needs more direct instruction than he's getting. One can also write a behavior plan (addendum to the IEP) that specifies how the entire staff is to respond to behavior issues: that's a really important piece for a child who doesn't obey behavior norms.
The school has an obligation to provide an appropriate education, but unfortunately it is often on the parents to drive the process of helping school see what is needed.
Yes, there are many websites with information for parents, and they can also join forums including this one to glean information. In addition to parents becoming knowledgeable, educators/administrators can join groups like the Davidson Educator's Guild. Possibly more teacher education programs would benefit from including more information about giftedness and "hidden disabilities".
