Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums General Discussion Aargh! Only because we worked with her

I would think that the "her parents worked with her at home" statement would protect her from the "we don't like to feel stupid so we're going to pick on you" bullying? It's like... a normalizing statement.

I actually prefer it when some parents (that I'm not close to) think that I hothouse... it's less alienating for my kids.

Been there, been accused. By now people know the elder son (10) well enough to know that he couldn't really be hothoused without his consent; too difficult. Still get this regarding the younger.

I think this typically arises because people worry that their kid isn't doing X yet if they see a kid who is doing X precociously. I try to remember that it's about them. Not about us.

But to the OP: that the SCHOOL STAFF would say this, after approving a skip... I'm aghast. It is, among other things, a violation of FERPA for them to discuss your child's placement and the reasons for that placement with anybody.

DeeDee

I would be upset too. In my mind they should just have said ' x is in algebra because the staff determined it was the appropriate placement at this time'.

With the hothousing thing although it is possible to accelerate up to a point it seems to me you cannot teach what the child is not ready to learn. Ds3.5 is not ready to learn calculus so no effort on my part would do any good. Most 2 year olds are not ready to learn to read - including many who are gifted.

I sort of work with my older son. We do oral maths and occasional work sheets. And we talk a lot, and I never tell him to stop asking questions (although I ask him to come back to me later sometimes), and we read often. Should I ignore him to make sure he doesn't get ahead?

I would be mildly annoyed but I do agree with others' points about either not mentioning it or maybe mentioning in passing at some later opportune time to this teacher/friend how your DD just can't get enough of math or something along those lines. I don't think it was necessarily any criticism of you and would try to not take it that way unless there is no other reasonable explanation.

What struck me about this also is that if this woman is a coach (or even for those who aren't coaches), she must realize and acknowledge that kids/people have different athletic abilities and that some are way out on each end of the curve. So why not for math or other academic skills?? Sure, the best athletes practice a ton, but they also have a lot of natural ability, right?