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Joined: Apr 2010
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I hope it doesn't come to that-- you don't want him hating school or feeling rejected, or learning to act out more because they don't know what to do for him.
DeeDee
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I hope it doesn't come to that-- you don't want him hating school or feeling rejected, or learning to act out more because they don't know what to do for him.
DeeDee My biggest goal for our boys is for them to be happy. Whatever that means in terms of school, I don't know. But for now he really REALLY wants to go to school and be with other kids. As much as he doesn't know how to play with them and be with them, he really wants to be in their company and that's what I am trying to give him while he's so eager to go.
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Joined: Sep 2012
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i refused to take my son to the preschool the school district picked for him. i demanded and received NPA speech therapist--- best thing i EVER did!
for social, i made sure he was around NTs as often as possible, even joined a playgroup where i realized the moms were really a bunch of snobs--- but they had sweet kids who most importantly were NT, and i stayed with it for over a year! once he a week he ws with these kids, he went to so many birthday parties and holiday celebrations- it was all good and was the most amazing therapy and free of charge!
and for myself, i learned to navigate around and thru the snobbier moms and discovered that one on one, the ladies were actually very nice! i guess it was just mob mentality, that's when the snobbery seemed to happen LOL
i think though if you want/need these services for your son, yes you must jump thru their hoops. the thing is, they don't really WANT to have to provide services b/c of the money. at least that's how it is here, if a parent doesn't know of the service- even though child could benefit? or if the parent is asking about a service for child- but parent again doesn't actually KNOW if it is available? here- the school district doesn't offer the service or any information re the service.
just keep advocating. keep being the squeaky wheel.
though for me, i found endearing myself to them seemed to work better. or rather- endearing my son to them,and how well he was doing and how everyone was so awesome at helping him and were such an amazing help and part of our team. yada yada yada
((it was sometimes very true, other times? not so much! but it helped serve up results and them wanting to help...
One can never consent to creep when
one feels an impulse to soar!
~Helen Keller
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Joined: Jul 2012
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i refused to take my son to the preschool the school district picked for him. i demanded and received NPA speech therapist--- best thing i EVER did!
for social, i made sure he was around NTs as often as possible, even joined a playgroup where i realized the moms were really a bunch of snobs--- but they had sweet kids who most importantly were NT, and i stayed with it for over a year! once he a week he ws with these kids, he went to so many birthday parties and holiday celebrations- it was all good and was the most amazing therapy and free of charge!
and for myself, i learned to navigate around and thru the snobbier moms and discovered that one on one, the ladies were actually very nice! i guess it was just mob mentality, that's when the snobbery seemed to happen LOL
i think though if you want/need these services for your son, yes you must jump thru their hoops. the thing is, they don't really WANT to have to provide services b/c of the money. at least that's how it is here, if a parent doesn't know of the service- even though child could benefit? or if the parent is asking about a service for child- but parent again doesn't actually KNOW if it is available? here- the school district doesn't offer the service or any information re the service.
just keep advocating. keep being the squeaky wheel.
though for me, i found endearing myself to them seemed to work better. or rather- endearing my son to them,and how well he was doing and how everyone was so awesome at helping him and were such an amazing help and part of our team. yada yada yada
((it was sometimes very true, other times? not so much! but it helped serve up results and them wanting to help... you're right ... I'm sure it is about money! ... we're in IL and pay ridiculous money in property tax. Our house is worth maybe $180 000 and we pay $8400/year in property tax and out of that about $5500 goes to the school district. If they can't provide me with the services I need, why not give me the money back and I'll make sure our kids get what they need??? ugh! one of the reasons why I'd like to see DS4 in pre-school is it would give me time to work one-on-one with DS2 who needs it. I do have a great option for socializing at the moment. There is a local kids play house / cafe that is set up sort of like a Children's Museum with different play areas and a small gym and the staff supervises the kids while parents can stay in a cafe behind a glass wall and relax, work ... or can be inside with the kids. We have a monthly membership so can drop in anytime. I figured out the days / times when there aren't as many kids so it's not as overwhelming for my boys so if all else fails with school, this is the perfect place to be. I just wish I could have him in something more structured. But we all love this place and the staff is great with the boys and they don't judge them based on some of their quirky behavior ... they just see two sweet little boys  .
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here's another update! Found out for DS4's speech therapist that the special ed director changed her mind AGAIN and decided against further testing ... they finally realized that one on one testing will not prove a thing with our son. He'd once again slip through the cracks like he has a few times to this point. So, since there's such a gap between how he tests / acts during testing and when he's in normal social / school situations, the special ed director said since we already have an IEP in place, they'll adjust it and put him in pre-school after all! we should got take a look at the class he'd be in on Tuesday. Hopefully everything goes well, he / we like it and we can call this our FIRST VICTORY in what I'm sure will be a large number of battles in the future! lol
In the meanwhile, we've jumped on the GFCF diet (gluten free / casein free) ... I'm not expecting any miracles, but since both sons have food allergies and sensitivities already, I thought, WHY NOT? ... after first 6 days on the diet, no significant changes in DS4, other than he seems to be able to focus a little better! YAY for that! ... DS2.5 on the other hand (who was a huge dairy addict) has in just 6 days gone from not communicating to asking for help and even repeating sentences ... AND I just now realized that after he surprised us with being able to read a lot of words without anyone teaching him (started 2 weeks ago) ... he's now trying to actually really READ text! I've seen him take books, follow with his finger word after word and trying to read them all out loud! When I heard him read "... play in the sun", I was floored! It's not something he'd ever say! He only speaks in words! I'm pretty sure his speech therapist will be panicking when she hears this on Monday! She might lose her job with us soon! lol
Anyways ... that was a little side note regarding the GFCF diet ... just thought I'd throw it in with the good news about pre-school. Now, the question is if the school is a good news or if I'll be regretting it in two weeks!
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Joined: Apr 2010
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Sounds like real progress, Mk13. Kudos to you for hanging in there through the messiness of the process...
DeeDee
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