Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums General Discussion Boy Scout Camp -- 4 days of crying?

I know this isn't a giftie question, but you guys have lots of great advice, so here goes --

Dh just came home from a scout meeting with ds11 where they told the parents that the younger kids will probably be REALLY SUPER homesick for the first few days of overnight camp (1 week). "The crying usually stops around wednesday."
Seriously??

Please let me know if that has been others' experience, I just can not see ds really freaking out, but he's just been on a really good even keel for the last year or so, so maybe I am just assuming his happy spirits would not be dented by being away from us. He laughed when I told him some of the kids cry a lot; I said, 'well that must be for families that really like each other!'

Even if they do cry for a few days...is that major damage we'd be inflicting on our son, or a good growth experience?? Very confusing.

Chris-
If it helps, my DS8 just got back from a week long sleep away camp. He was gone 6 nights Sunday afternoon to Saturday morning. He begged us to be able to go and everyone we know thought we were totally insane for agreeing. He has NEVER spent the night anywhere else and we weren't sure he'd make it through the first night, let alone a week but we gave it a shot.

He LOVED it. I mean really loved it. Three weeks later I'm still getting "Well at camp they..." for everything. He didn't cry once, wasn't homesick and didn't seem to care. He wants to go back next year for TWO weeks!

I would want to know what the plan is for homesickness. The camp my DS went to had a very serious tiered plan from distraction to when and why they would call home. The first call home is from counselor to parent only and the child isn't allowed to call. The second call is the child, monitored by the counselor. THey pretty much will not consider sending a child home until after the second night. By then, anyone who is homesick gets the "Oh come on, you made it this far! You can totally do it, let's go get a cookie and go for a kayak on the lake!"

Send your son with whatever comfort item (blanket, pillow, stuffed animal etc) that he is used to! If you can send mail do it early so he gets something day one. I also packed little notes in his suitcase for him to randomly find, like stuffed inside his shirt or his socks. Nothing cheesy or embarassing- just little riddles or notes from home.

He'll be okay :-)

Comfort animal: his books, lol!
He does actually have a stuffed big cat, like Hobbes, that he still has 'near the bed', but I am pretty sure he'd never take it.

Yes, I need to find out about the mail, what I can put in a care package, and I am definitely doing the notes in socks thing, if he ever changes his socks, that should be great!! I like the non-cheesy advice, cause I could have sent some very embarrassing stuff!
He said one of the older kids is only going to bring one change of clothes...uh, ok.


(one thing I love about scouts is that they don't go in for the whole 'wear stylish clothes even if they are completely weather inappropriate, uncomfortable/don't protect you from the sun', they really emphasize just wearing the right stuff, and imo, that is cool.)


thanks so much, that does help!!!

Are you going to the camp too? We do cub scouts and go with our boys to the camp. However, when they get to boy scouts, one of us will go too. Partly my concern if the camp is well-supervised, concern about sexual abuse (I hate to say that but...). Also, from the practical point, if your son is trying to get merit badges done, it will go smoother if you are available.

I know, as you probably do, that I'm a softy, but the I find the idea that they would consider four days of crying ok baffling!

11 years old is young to go to camp alone, I think. One thing for scouting is that the scout is NOT allowed into the tent of another adult. So if your son were there alone, he can't go into your neighbor and the neighbor son's tent if he is homesick. Better to just go yourself! I don't think four days of crying is okay either!
My 8 year old spent the night at a local camp through our city. I was a bit of a wreck but he had fun. We dropped him off at 7 pm and picked him up at noon, and that's only one day! He had fun.

I did not think 4 days of crying is ok, but I thought surely they are exaggerating! Age 11 seemed pretty right-on to me, too, not at all too young. 9 or 8, that seems a bit young.
My son doesn't seem distressed in the least when he considers the week away, so I think he is pretty ready.
Our boy scout troop emphasizes boy-led scouting, they didn't really much encourage us to attend, and frankly I'm not sure how either of us would attend for more than a couple days anyhow.
Ds11 seems stoked to go, and does have one friend he knows from boy scouts who will attend as well.

As for the fear about sexual abuse or other abuse/harassment from adults or older boys, I definitely feel that fear, however I think that ds has been well trained on what to do if anything like this comes up.
They do have a variety of rules to keep even the appearance of impropriety between an adult and any child from occurring.
He is very level-headed, I don't know, maybe I'm crazy but I don't want him to be too sheltered either.

Now that I've seen the notes from the scout leaders, I do get the impression that there was a certain amount of exaggeration in the 'crying stops on wednesday'...I think my DH has a hard time getting hyperbolic comments like that.. Sheesh.

But they do recommend keeping the notes upbeat and not saying stuff like 'we miss you soooo much', etc.

Sorry Chris 1234, I didn't mean to imply you were doing anything wrong as a parent. I find it hard to get those kinds of remarks too. Plus I know some people who would not have been joking, sigh. Anyway, my children are too young for me to have much advice, I have all that to come. Eeeep!

I just picked my DS11 up from camp last week. He had a terrible first night, allergies, moscitos bites rainstorm ect. They actually let him call home it was so bad. My wife was totally worried and wanted to go get him but I talked her out of it and the next day everything was fine and he had one of the best experiances of his life. These camps are very well run and supervised. Your son should be fine.