Hi all,
Long time lurker, new poster. :Waves:
I'm wondering if anyone has any recommendations for a neuropsych or other learning disability assessor in Illinois or, alternatively, in Colorado?
Danger ahead - welcome to the longest post, ever.
Here's our really, really, super long story with lots of over-sharing for those interested. I'm writing this down, partly for my own vent, and also hoping someone will see their kid in some of this and share some helpful advice:
Background:
My daughter, 6, is one of those kids who just read as gifted from a very early age. She never shuts down, taught herself to read at 2 (decoding - but didn't make the jump into true comprehension until this year), crazy inferences, simple math at 2 etc. She is highly verbal, full of energy and ideas, creative, loving, affectionate, and just really, really SPARKLY.
However, she has also always been EXTREMELY difficult. She cried 10 hours a day for the first year of her life, she wants everything her way in an atypical way, she really struggles with executive function, impulse control and emotions. I remember getting her out of her crib at 15 months after an attempted "nap" time (naps really stopped at a year) and she said to me, "You the worsest mommy ever. I want a new one."
We've struggled in school and activities (even gifted schools) when the teacher changes the schedule, when my daughter is overwhelmed, in transitions, etc. She has yelled at teachers, pushed other kids, hidden under tables and refused to come out, etc. She doesn't understand physical boundaries.
At home, we never know if it is going to be a good day or a bad day. We often walk on eggshells to keep the peace. We have a son who is 2 who reads, so far, as very typical (both in terms of gifted ability and temperament). It is hard on all of us and I often find myself applying such different parenting techniques that I get confused.
I have read literally hundreds of books (the most effective has been nurtured heart) to try to help my daughter. She has been assessed with Sensory Integration issues, and we attended OT several times a week, which was really helpful - I saw a huge change in her, but only while we were going. She makes very little eye contact, needs constant praise and attention, craves consistency, and talks or sings or hums to herself constantly.
She has also displayed minor tics (both vocal and motor) on and off for the past year that her pediatrician said would likely be transient.
Our Move:
We are in a bit of a difficult position because we recently moved from Colorado (where my daughter was set to attend a school that really gets gifted kids AND all the other issues that she deals with) to Illinois (where we are in public K) for a job change. My husband also went from a high-paying private job to help save-the-world at the government so we have had to make some serious financial adjustments.
Assessments:
My daughter was assessed with the WPPSI at 3.5 for admission into a private school program. I believe it was an abbreviated version due to her age (3 verbal subtests, 2 performance subtests). Her her verbal scores were 18, 18, 16 and her performance were 16 and 13. She also received a Kauffmann achievement of some sort - score 153. The tester did not see any problems with attention and did not think that the scatter of scores was remarkable.
Recently, she has been assessed at school (I'm not sure with what tests, but for achievement/placement) with some interesting results. Her reading and math results both placed her somewhere in the 2nd grade level. The testers remarked that she could answer almost any of the problems asked, but that she took a really long time - no automation. She fell out of her chair. She kept asking irrelevant questions. She, alternatively, said things were too easy or too hard so she wouldn't attempt them. They said she is clearly a bright little girl, but that, essentially, there are other kids in her class who are achieving more. Our school system seems to be all about achievement.
She was also assessed for a weekend enrichment program here, with similar results (scores - 99th percentile math, but only 92nd reading). The tester said that the brief intelligence testing performed was "really amazing" but in reference to the achievement testing, my daughter moved too quickly through material without really listening to what was being asked.
Current Status:
School has actually gone well, in terms of structure. I believe she has learned a great deal about following rules and behavioral expectations. She hasn't had any major meltdowns in kindergarten (a major improvement from all levels of preschool). She complains frequently that school is boring. She has not made many friends, but it is only K.
My daughter's academic skill level has really remained stagnant for the past year. Her writing is really a frustrating spot. She will pull out truly remarkable things sometimes (after I explained to her what they were, she listed prime numbers to about 50 in the car for me - with only a few mistakes), but she still struggles with reading relatively simple words sometimes (for example, the word was illustration, she guessed illusion, island, before finally landing on the correct word.)
We don't do a ton of enrichment at home, mostly because she doesn't want to - she would rather play pretend kitty or another imaginary game.
We just had the last day of her weekend gifted enrichment program, and the teacher spoke to every set of parents about how well their child had done and provided them with some additional material to take home. Well, she spoke to every parent but my husband and I. When my husband finally asked how things had gone, the teacher's comments were that focus was sometimes a problem, and that my daughter asked lots of questions. We were not given any of the additional information or material. This is a teacher who has been teaching gifted kids in this program for a long time, so she "gets" gifted.
Why I'm looking for a neuropsych assessment:
The more I look at my daughter's behavior, the more I feel that she is really struggling with some sort of learning disability or with a place on the Autism spectrum, or ADHD, etc. I am also not sure where she lives on the gifted spectrum, and whether that matters.
I really want her to love school, and to feel accepted both at school and at home, but often she just struggles to "fit." I don't want her to be bored, but I don't want her to get in over her head, either. We have access to really great enrichment programs here, but she hasn't seemed to completely benefit from those (see aforementioned example). I want teachers to root for my daughter, rather than to see her as a problem.
Most of the gifted kids I encounter seem to be high achievers and seem inquisitive and well-adjusted. That is not my kid. I am hoping to find someone who will help us create a place of belonging for my daughter.
As a side note:
I was assessed PG (160+ when I was 6), and was recently diagnosed with ADHD, inattentive type, as an adult. Currently on meds which make a huge difference. I was grade-advanced in school and always achieved enough to get placed in gifted programs and honors classes in college, but I was never at the top of my class. I really struggled in graduate school and in my career with procrastination, scheduling etc. I know that ADHD is extremely heritable, so that might be a factor.
