Every kid, and every family is different though, and the wonderful news is that there are usually many ways to 'course adjust' as we get to know our children better.
If you are living in an area that is 'fast-track' enough to support a serious preschool, it's possibly true that OG kids are well served by the public schools even with the gift of time business.
I like to use these moments of 'deep feelings' when other people stand there and tell me I'm making a terrible choice (My dad a few months ago when I broke the news about my son going to boarding school) like metal detectors to help me look inside and see exactly were my fears are, and exactly where I would like reassurance, and exactly where I feel insecure.
I know that when I'm not feeling insecure, and someone starts down that path, I can pretty much guarantee that my body language will take care of things:
Warm smile, a bit indulgent, head cocked to the side, and eye's rolled when I say: Oh yeah, I remember when I thought that!
Then eyes wide and head up and bigger smile:
I wish I had one of those 'standard issue' kids. You've know my kid a long time - he's a lot of things, but regular isn't one of them.
Shrug
It happens, I'm just glad I was able to take the blinders off and notice.
BTW for my son he really did get the 'gift of time' as a 13 year old and made very good use of it. I love your idea of 'year in the bank.' Since he has a summer birthday AND a gradeskip, I joked with him that he was going to do 9th grade until he got it right even if he had to do it 3 times. He knew I was kidding, it wasn't really about the outcome, rather about the work he was putting into it, but sometimes it's a good thing to keep a child guessing a little.
Smiles,
Grinity
