Jen, I know what you mean. This is harrowing stuff.
As for whether things are getting worse, I can think of a lot of scenarios:
--He's "worse" at school in that they are seeing more ups and downs, but more level at home because you are so attentive
--The teachers are watching all the other kids mature, learn to deal with expectations, etc., and your DS is not mastering these skills at the same rate, so even if he's making progress it still looks "worse" to them
--He's melting down less, but when he does melt down, it's more severe. Possibly because he's so disappointed in and surprised by his own bad behavior, when he was hoping he had it under control. BTDT.
If you keep collecting information you may be able to get a grip on the pattern and figure out what he's really going through and how to change the pattern.
Yeah, we were not thrilled with medicating a little kid either. For us it came down to relieving suffering, and I'm a little shocked to say that I have not regretted doing so even for a minute. YMMV.
DeeDee
