I used to think most people were good and would only want to help or offer encouragement, especially at church, but in our little Oklahoma town the reality is if a boy is in pain or shows weakness in any way the message from a lot of adults (not just a few) is "Be a man, suck it up, don't be a wuss, etc." My husband didn't realize it was this bad at first, but he finally saw it.
I had a long talk with my dad a few weeks ago. Turns out he read a lot when he was very young, but he was singled out for being a "bookworm" and learned to hide it. He had a very distinguished military career and can be very gruff - something he developed to keep people from seeing his perceptive and sensitive side.
