Inky, I think there are options:
--you could find a different choir. Sometimes the director makes a huge difference. Sometimes a "service" choir like church feels different from a "leisure" choir like municipal children's choir.
--you could find a different venue for her musical education, like instrumental music at school or private instrument lessons. Some music stores offer a "sampler" where you can just go try out instruments and see how they feel and sound.
I'd probably be inclined to say "you need music in your life, let's look at the various ways to get it" and see if you can find a solution.
I'd also say that 8 is young; starting an instrument at 9 or 10 is OK if you and she decide you want a pause.
DeeDee
