Hi. We are dealing with VERY similar issues with our DD6. She also has a disparity in reading/writing (reading middle school level), math probably mid 2nd grade level (she'll start 1st in a few weeks).
Webb's book (yes, that is the full title) specifically says, if I recall correctly, that ODD should NOT be diagnosed that early, in fact, I think he uses 14 as a cut off date. Our dd's therapist has suggested Intermittent Explosive Disorder) and other scary POSSIBLE Dx. We are NOT ready to have a psychiatrist see her yet. We don't want her to be misdiagnosed. This type of misdiagnosis is MUCH more common in gifted kids.
I think it is very important for your friend to read the book, and take it with her to the therapist. This is what we are going to do with ours. We are taking it a day at a time. Part of our process is to have her re-evaluated.
