Tory, I would disagree with your assessment that you should never surpise the teacher with an unplanned visit. IMO, it seems as if your visit spurred the teacher to express the negative thoughts she's had towards your son's performance in class.
You may have headed off the question about holding him back for the next year. Personally, I wouldn't have wanted to deal with this in June, now you have time to work on any improvements he should be expected to make before the end of the school year. I think this actually all worked to your child's advantage.
Neato
