I loved reading that, Kriston. It made me smile many times. I'm sure I'm labeled as the pushy mom at all 3 of the schools I'm involved with.
For me, my parents gave their 3 daughters a lot of room (they were self-absorbed and mostly absent because of messy divorce). We were all high achievers without any pressure to do so. Luckily we seemed to find brainy friends and had a desire to do well academically. But we all went to gifted magnet schools (so my parents must have been involved in this key decision). Even without encouragement we all went to top-rated universities and graduated. However, I guess deep-down I feel I squandered my talents because I didn't have parental guidance/support or financial liquidity (camps, programs, sports, etc.). I always was working from about age 12 and I think that's valuable in teaching responsibility, but what did I miss out on during those hours and hours? Yearbook, sports, drama, camps, etc.
I'm sure I bring this baggage to my kids every day with my endless stories about "when I was a kid..". My kids are very good about listening and hopefully there is a lesson in each story told. I want my kids to have more adult assistance and guidance in things they want to do/pursue. They should know their parents are there as a safety net, advocates, ride home, etc. If they're doing robotics and the school robots are old and missing pieces, I want them to know I will support their work and even buy the school a new robot. I want them to understand all the opportunities available to them and support them if they want to try things.
I think my heart's in the right place, but I do think this ends up to put a lot of pressure on them. Sometimes it's nice to go under the radar as a kid and not have everything scrutinized and questioned. My oldest is getting an 89 in French because he messed up one assignment. My husband and I interrogated him about it this morning...what, why, who, where,...poor kid. I know he'll bring his grade back up and it doesn't matter, but we couldn't help ourselves.
