I truly want to thank all of you for taking your time to help me figure some of this out. I am now feeling alot better - I'm no longer emotionally floundering in this bottomless pool all alone - I now at least have a lifeline of sorts with the information you have given which is helping to empower me. Thank all of you from the bottom of my heart!
Grinity - I live in the panhandle of Florida. I would love to have the name of a "professional tester" in this area who could possibly help us out. I only hope it doesn't turn out to be the same idiot we've already seen - my luck! Becaue of my husband's career we are flexible with traveling - just can't afford a whole lot of $ right now (who can?!).
As far as to our "family reasons" for putting ds into school... My husband is a pilot who, due to the economy, may be looking at furlough in the upcoming future. If that happens I would probably need to go back to work to help make "ends meet". Not our first choice, but something we may end up having to deal with. We are blessed that our family hasn't given us too much grief about homeschooling. I think it helps that we try to socialize the kids as much as possible. They ds and dd(7)both are on the swim team and play baseball and soccer respectively. In addition to that, they attend a special "blended school" for homeschoolers at the "Gulfarium" (like a mini-seaworld) one day a week.
The first time I ever entertained the idea of ds possibly being a lot brighter than his peers was when he was just 2 years old and enrolled in a preschool/mothers-day-out program. I remember picking him up from school and having the director of the facility pull me aside and tell me that she felt my son was "exceptionally bright". She said that he already knew things that they were only just beginning to teach their older students at that time (his ABCs, numbers and colors, phone number, address, etc.) That comment planted the seed in my brain and ever since then I've wondered if there were actually anything to it. His studies have always come very easily to him - and he is extremely self-directed and LOVES to learn for the sake of learning . He will pick up a Greek Mythology book or a copy of Ancient World History and read them just for pleasure. Most of his test scores on all of his achievement tests throughout the years (Iowa basic skills and FCAT (Florida Comprehensive) have ranged from the 93rd - 99th percentile.
He was in that private preschool for a year prior to attending kindergarten, 1st grade and part of 2nd grade at a very small parochial school - so small that second grade encompassed 2nd, 3rd and 4th graders and still only had about 15 students. He did very well in all of those grades. The school did not give IQ tests, but he did take the Iowa Basic Skills achievement Test in Kindergarten, 1st and 2nd grade there prior to my pulling him out and beginning homeschooling. I pulled him out because the school was not able to meet his needs. He was getting left to "stagnate" while they taught to the more "needy" kids. His high scores on those tests (other than in spelling) reinforced my wondering if he were, indeed, in the "gifted" category at all. However because of it's small size, the school there was not really equipped to address this. At the end of homeschooling him in 3rd grade I had him take the Florida Comprehensive Achievement Test (FCAT) where he once again scored well.
Ds was not an "easy" baby. He screamed ALL the time, it seemed! Pretty much until he was 4 years old. Then he suddenly quieted down and became more "normal". My husband and I used to jokingly say that the "Aliens had finally come and switched him out with a human baby"! We don't know why he was so miserable as a small child - but my take on it has always been that he was a miniature adult born into a baby's body and was totally p.o.'d that he couldn't communicate his needs and desires the way he wanted! Probably too simplistic - but it sure felt like that at the time!
As far as to whether my son could actually have something like aspergers or a form of it - I honestly don't know. I have a feeling not - yet when I read the descriptions of such children I do note some real similarities. He does occasionally talk in a type of "robotic" voice - although he doesn't do it all the time. He also is rather sensitive to certain textures -both in clothing and in foods. He never liked transitions - but he has gotten better as he's gotten older. I can remember taking him to preschool and him screaming and pitching a fit the whole way that he didn't want to go - then doing the exact same thing in reverse when it was time to pick him up! It was embarrassing! He still doesn't like going places unexpectedly or at the last minute - I need to prep him in advance first so that he can get used to the idea. Then he whines and complains about it until he finally accepts it. And he does get pretty wrapped up in certain topics - maps and his globe being two of them. He will sit and stare at that globe for hours studying it. Hence, he knows a lot about geography. I can remember in 2nd grade his teacher asked the students to keep a journal. Ds mentioned something in it about "Chad" - which the teacher mistakenly assumed was a child he was describing as "no kid in 2nd grade that she knew of had ever heard of that country, let alone exactly where it was!".
Ever since I can remember he has claimed he wants to be a meteorologist and hasn't deviated from that. He loves learning about and discussing weather phenomena. Ds does have the ability to have two way conversations - although he definitely does tend to dominate - and prefers for them to go "his" way! And he does make eye contact with others when speaking. He also "gets jokes" and has a dry sense of humor. Just a little while ago, for example, the family dog was hesitating to come into the room so I jokingly asked the dog "what he was waiting for - an engraved invitation?". My son overheard me and with a twinkle in his eye responded that if that were the case, I'd "better be sure I had plenty of wax on hand considering how timid our dog is!". I had to think about it at first for a minute before I realized that this was his attempt at humor, as he apparently knows that most formal invitations come shut with sealing wax (something I've never taught him - he must have read about it somewhere as we don't get many of those type invitations around here - ha!). As you can see, though, that type of humor probably isn't recognized among his peers most of his peers. When I read an asperger's description of "mini Professor" - I had to laugh, though, as I have often accused him of being that myself. So - there are some areas which would seem to fit - and others not so much.
My son is "ambidextrous" - he writes and eats with his left hand but throws balls, etc. with his right. His grandfather (my dad) was the same way. I have always wondered if his difficulty in writing or spelling had anything to do with that. Although he is a wonderful, advanced reader - a couple grade levels above, as I've mentioned before, he is a horrible speller - although strangely enough, he can sometimes spell words backwards that he can't spell forwards? Perhaps that can be related to possible visual/spatial issues?
As I said before, he seems to get along fairly well with his classmates at the blended school and other activities, but he doesn't have that many close friends - really only one - but that may be because of our living circumstances. There are no other young children who live in our neighborhood. That, combined with homeschooling, doesn't really allow him to rub shoulders with alot of other children other than who is exposed to in his extracurricular activities. He really only has one other boy - who is 11 and considered "gifted" - that he plays with somewhat regularly. As I said before I do think that sometimes he is a bit over most of his peer's heads with his comments, etc. He definitely enjoys the company of older children or adults.
Hope some of this helps explain our situation to you all a bit better. And thanks again so much for all of your input!
Diane
Last edited by DianerLu; 01/24/09 09:57 AM.