Hi BKD,
Good for you for 'taking the bull by the horns' and insiting on some effort at home. Without your efforts, you would have no idea of the severity of your son's 'underachievement/perfectionism.' You would just have a child in the top reading group who is 'allergic to effort.' Our worst fear!
I'm always going on and on about taking the attitude that we parents insist that our children afterschool and make an effort. I realized, from reading your post, that this is meant as a preventive and a diagnositic for 'underachievement/perfectionism' - it's too late for the preventive for your DS6! ((Although DS4 is in great shape, no?))
Of course get the vision checked, and not just by a 'regular optomitirist' but if that isn't it, you have to face that Afterschooling isn't going to be enough, you are in the position of trying to reverse 2 or more years of damage from being unnacomidated at school. 2 years doesn't sound like much, but count up the hours as a % of time on the planet!
You must, must, must change his daily school environment, ASAP. If that is impossible, then continue Afterschooling but do lots of talking with DS6 about what HE is interested in, and be an enthusiastic 'co-learner' or audience. You will probably want to pick something 'non-academic' like martial arts or chess or video blogging to encourage and pray that the 'love of learning bug' bites him sometime on his way to college.
Meanwhile, you have DS4 as your greatest ally. Anything you want to get out of DS6, you must pretend to be teaching DS4. But I would save that for truly 'below grade level' performance.
DS6 is in a totally different stage of this disease. Now that you see what you've got, you are in the business of 'fixing' is daily school situation, and put on your coquette hat and get into 'selling' the 'joy of learning.'
Best Wishes,
Grinity
