I'm starting to really wonder what's reasonable to expect from school.
I have the same problem/question. I haven't come up with a good answer to it yet, so here we are. I sympathize.
This week with my MIL who is a 3rd grade teacher in a public school was interesting. She was essentially telling us to not expect much at all unless we enrolled DS in a private school (not really in the budget).
From what I hear, this isn't even true at many private schools. It's definitely a caveat emptor situation there. Some private schools are absolutely marvelous, while others basically say, "Look, this is the product we offer. As is. If you don't want to buy it, there are lots of others who will. Step aside, please." It definitely depends on the school.
I think you're certainly wise to start with the public school first!
