If your son's level of contentment isn't a good barometer for you, given his easy going nature and such, then maybe you need to be looking at the situation instead. Since he *is* content and says he likes it there now, maybe you should take a look at it from the other side. Is the setting good for him or, at the very least, not detrimental to him? Carolyn "Hoagie" is an advocate for finding the "least-worst option" when it comes to education for GT kids. The reality is that there is very rarely the perfect fit. Perhaps some homeschoolers find that fit but anyone who has to deal with the school system just won't. For that matter, even some homeschoolers might admit that their situation isn't perfect (not enough social stuff, parent had to quit a career, etc).
Ask yourself some questions about the teacher and the classroom. Does the teacher seem to understand his needs? Is she making efforts to move him forward? Is there enough time in the day where he is engaged in an activity where he is learning something - even life or social skills like group work or leadership skills or time management skills? Then ask about friends: does he connect with the kids? Does he like to play with them, does he talk about them, does he get along with them? Then ask yourself what negatives you see: is he learning to be lazy? Is he getting a big head being a big fish in a little pond? Is he having any emotional reactions that leak out at home?
Again, I'd say that you are smart to keep an eye on things and be prepared, but don't look for problems if there aren't any! A mom of a 17 year old DYS recently told me to take it one year at a time. She gave me some good advice about not stressing about all the decisions and realizing that you do the best you can with what you have right now and that your child will be okay. I always knew this but needed the reminder
She told me how she discovered her son's learning continues no matter where he is. She also discovered, through many changes in schools and settings, that no educational setting is perfect for these kids. Her bottom line advice was to make sure my son feels good about himself and has the tools he needs to be a successful, productive and confident adult.
Your son is 5. There are many developmentally appropriate things to be learned in K in addition to educational learning. You are likely going to have to do a skip somewhere down the road. Saying that things are all right for right now doesn't mean they always will be. That's okay. You'll face those dragons when you meet them. Reading what you've posted here I'd say keep doing what you are doing. Unless you can arrange for partial home schooling and have the afternoon at home with both boys (my state allows that). Remember that the boys are each unique individuals - don't expect or set up one to follow the other's footsteps. I understand the worry you have based on your DS8's response/experience. But I think your younger son is going to be just fine!
Good job, mom!
They're lucky to have you looking out for them.
