It is possible to have a great relationship with the public schools and foster a good fit for a HG/PG child. I think it has to be the right school/principal and everyone has to agree to work together. There are a few here who are making it work. I don't want to dismiss the truly horrible and in my opinion abusive situations that some poster's children were subject to. That seems to be the case in far too many stories.
Teamwork is always hard, I think. (It's harder for some of us than others, but it's always hard.
)
And getting a good, workable team that's moving in the same direction when it comes to one's child (My
baby!) is a difficult process that requires patience, good listening skills, advocacy without turn-'em-off pushiness, and persistence. Not all of us can make it work, whether because of our own personal failings or the failings of the other team members. When it doesn't work, it can be truly harmful, and I don't think we should underestimate the potential for harm that's present there.
But when it does work...AH! It's golden!
When I look at the parents who haven't had success in my community, I think some of the problem lies with them somehow needing the school to validate that they also think their child is gifted.
Once my children were tested and we had other "evidence" of their abilities, I became less concerned with whether or not such and so teacher or person thought my child was as smart as I did. I felt I got further by just presenting the facts as is and then asking them to help us figure out the best situation that was available at school.
I think you're right that until a parent accepts and embraces a GT child's GTness, it is really hard to be an effective advocate. I don't think you have to be a bull in a china shop to get results (not that you were suggesting that you do, obviously!), but I do think you have to have the courage of your convictions.
